A Whisper & A Clamor

Well.

2008-02-07T09:28:00.000+08:00

Seems like apologizing has done its job, i believe, that will never ever happen again. Once bitten twice shy mah. Haha.

02/01. Haha, i guess i'll remember this day for life.
That was also maintainence day, in a way, haha. Which was rather, successful, and a great start to the year. Had dinner with the sign on gang, + those seniors present.

Next day, sat, went to paint the banner in the morning. School was really deserted. Only grace and steffi came though. Finished around 2, too late to go js's house to drum, so went off with grace to eat lunch/get booties. Then, went to tm, to realise that they are still not out. Went bookreading, windowshopping, in times, in popular. Haha, that was fun! Lotsa interesting books in there. Then, they came, and while js and yw went to do yl's hair, me, daryl and wynne went to find presents, found this handphone pouch, a card, and a heart shaped pink gay puzzle. Haha.

So cool, was rushing it on the mrt, the way there, and at the airport.

Met the rest. Everyone! Its so great to see everyone again. Like 21/27! Cos some are overseas, and the rest were busy. Lunch at the area outside burger king! Then it was photos, lots and lots of gay photos, : D. Then, they started doing stuff, like showing the old photos, especially the one of ant trying to grab yw's _____. HAHAHA. Ruining his reputation with the nanyang girls as well. Haha. Fun.

Stayed over at daryl's house afterwards, was guitar heroing mostly. : D Fun. Fastforward, to something. Which i cannot remember! I know i had something on on sunday!

Then, back to school, 2 days only though. Fun, had ug dance practice after monday. So cute and so gay! Haha. Ck can dance! Other than that, nothing much, other than the comp train, haha.

Fast forward to yesterday, guitar practice, then, lunch, then more guitar prac. Zzz, lots of niaoing as usual. Haha.

But its chinese new year now! So its fun! Yay, going visiting later, then, its a busy weekends. Sat - 5C43 outing + Semakau. Sun - Guitar tuan bai!

Everything.

2008-02-01T20:49:00.000+08:00

Well, with the way things are going, i doubt either of us would have a good time.

For both of us to be back to normal, to get things back to the way they were, for the sake of everything, i guess, i'll risk it all.

I will confess. And god, please, help me with the things from there.

I pray for things to be back to normal. Please, this is just so screwed up.

There's a first to everything right? This will be it, i do hope it goes well. If it doesn't, i guess, i'll just see how things go.

Yes, i know. I made a few big mistakes already. But, i guess, thats just a part of life right? No one's perfect, and i hope that you don't mind.

Well,

2008-01-29T21:51:00.000+08:00

If anyone cares, and actually reads this. I'm sorry for how i've been acting, but heck...

Just give me some time alright? I'm so damn tired, and there's so many things going on in my head now. I can't bring myself to do anything even. Just let me mull things over, for a few days, or maybe even a few weeks, and i'll probably be back to my old self again.

I hope.

Someone.

2008-01-29T21:22:00.000+08:00

Someone tell me why, things had to end up this way. I have a lot, a lot of patching up to do. ): And please, don't let the rumours spoil everything. That has happened way too many times, and i can't afford to lose another friend...

You know what? I have no idea, whether you found out or not. Well, and since you aren't telling me anything, there's not much i can do right?

God, give me a sign. Please.

Wow.

2008-01-27T19:05:00.000+08:00

Its been long, since an update post. Haha.

Here's some stuff that has happened over the past weeks.

Lets see, first cmc meeting, then house outing, on the 19th.

Then school, was rather, eventful and uneventful. Lots of niaoing all around, sigh. ): Haha, then there was the scolding during chem lesson. Gah.

Lots of stuff, i guess.

Then, some more stuff to think about, recently.

Then there was the museum trip, which a lot a lot of people went for. Quite cool though! Then, me grace and simin went to nus to meet with camelia and then eunice, for the semakau guides thing. Then, went off for guitar later, with grace. Ate a makeshift dinner of one milo energy bar, each. Haha. And then when we reached, there was a lot and a lot of niaoing when we arrived. Sigh.

On another note, i'm playing the drums! For cai hong and tai yang zhi ge. Whee. Hopefully, i won't mess up. Ah well.

Sent manching off today, with the sj people, grace got the ex pri school people to come, and the 4a people came too. One huge mass of people! Haha, fun stuff. Rushing around, sending him in. Etc, etc. Really, memorable. Singing peng you and shao nian, then eating lunch. Ah well, we'll all miss him.

Sigh, but life has to go on, doesn't it? Love and loss is all part of the complex equation that makes up life.

Oh.

2008-01-24T21:34:00.000+08:00

Please do cheer up! You, you and most especially YOU. Haha. Smile! (:

Tactless.

2008-01-24T19:59:00.001+08:00

Nah. It wasn't right to post that. Its in the drafts now, anyway.

Maybe.

2008-01-22T21:07:00.000+08:00

Maybe, I'm just jealous.

Updates.

2008-01-18T21:04:00.000+08:00

School's been rather, normal. Same old things, everyday. Some of the teachers are rather cool too, like Mr Tan Jin Song, and Ms Edison.

Whee. The classmates are a great bunch of people to hang out with too, interesting people, rather cool too! Haha.

Then there's guitar, and st johns. Which are going on rather normally.

Stress is starting to build up, too much things. But heck, I don't want to drop anything! Ahh!

Life's been rather great i guess, God's been nice to me so far too.

Cept for one major upset, its smooth sailing all the way. : D

And thank god, for people and friends to talk to, and keep me company. : D

Whee.

2008-01-16T22:20:00.000+08:00

I'm better now. I guess. Passion's dying though.

Hm.

2008-01-12T10:53:00.000+08:00

I'm happy. : D

Well, everything just seems right now. Old friends, new friends.

Despite the crazy workload from school, st johns, and guitar, i'm happy! Might not be coping too well, but with you people around, somehow, i'll make it through.

Set your sights high! Aim for the top! Go Guitar Ensemble! Go AC! Go Support! Go 5C43! Go blahblahblah.

Time to meet up with the old friends. Its really been a long time!

Haha. Happy.

Hm.

2008-01-10T21:04:00.000+08:00

Please don't tell me that i'm losing you already. Because sometimes, the disappointment gets too much to bear.

Well.

2008-01-08T22:06:00.000+08:00

Gah, i realised. You're the only one i talk to to destress, and relax. This is bad. Man, i sure would like someone else to talk to now. Hm.

:D

2008-01-07T18:00:00.000+08:00

Orientation Post, finally, after so long.

Wow, is all i can actually say. Never would have thought it would have been so FUN! Serious. Love my OG, my CG, my OGLs! I am willing to bet 5C43 is one of the highest class, along with nike and heracles! And darren and hazel are really nice OGLs!

First day, started off, with meeting in school, split into OGs, changed into our Ang Gong Gong tee, haha. Had class ice-breakers, super funny, with the ka-ching! And, all that lame musical chairs with names and da feng chui! Then house ice breakers, played the funny balloon game! Quite fun, died quite fast, after killing one person, haha.

Had Taxidi! Quite fun, i guess, rushed off to pool! First stop, rather cool! Then, rushed off to this funny place, duxton park, with no freaking idea where it was, got lost for a long while, before i called grace, turns out, they were heading to the same place as us, but with one more station completed. Gah, finished the station, consisting of mixing mocktails. Virgin mary was really awful, spicy and hot. Somehow, meixue drank the whole thing. Tried all three drinks, in the end.

Ate lunch before that station, was treated by our CT! Together with kenneth, we were sitting at the same table.

Then, went back, learnt the mass dance!

Next day, went to hostel, first stop was the flag design, then de-intellicode. Haha, our group totally owned that, finished the thing in 10 mins, made darren run back the second he came with the answer! Super smart group, cracked the clues, cracked the code! Then, survivor, lots of stations, had a lot of fun! Some snakes and ladders game, some telematch ministations game, some badminton racket hitting pingpong balls game, some tug of war thing, haha. That tug of war thing was really funny! Han Feng VS the others, super fun to watch. Haha.

Then, lunch, then, dragon boating! Super fun, got super wet! Never knew that it was so hard to row the boat. Fun stuff though. Then it was washing up, dinner as a class in Ghim Moh! Then, JAM night! Got really high with the people standing in front, grace, jiahui, steffi, etc. Ended up like a mosh pit! Haha, everyone in front was jumping and shaking their hands to the beat, or clapping! Then, fright night, watched wishing stairs, then had a mini csi thing, crazy hard to crack the clues. Then, two more movies, which i kinda slept through. Next morning, washed up, had breakfast, flag raising, and then a lot of mass dance! And then, writing notes behind each other, haha. Group photo taking and then, off to home.

Then at evening time, we met up again, had dinner as a class AGAIN! Haha, super bonded straight from the start. Had dinner in pizza hut, shared two pizzas, with grace, jiahui, weiliang, jasmine and someone else i forgot! Ahhhh. Vegetarian for jiahui, so we all shared the pizza, quite fun, haha. Started making a contact list! Set off for ecp, had a lot of fun with stupid games, like coffee tea, coffee tea, coffee or tea and stuff like that. Had mass dance, cheers in ecp. Mr Sng's super cool speech, dancing with the class. Popping of champagne! Super fun! Suddenly one more bottle appeared, so me, grace, jiahui, geneve i think, went mad, and started shaking it like mad! Popped it together in the end, haha, super fun! Announcing of results! House B WON! Whee! Went home with grace, geneve, wei liang and jasmine, after getting her wallet from pizza hut! Haha. Kept falling asleep physically, while being mentally awake.

Love my class lots! Haha.

Well.

2008-01-02T22:10:00.000+08:00

New year's post. Supposed to be way long ago, but heck, late is better than never.

Like i have said before, this year was a crazy rollercoaster ride of ups and downs, with more downs, and less ups. I kinda hate this year, to be frank.

Sure there were certain points where we were really high, level camp, electives, just to name a few.

Met a few new friends too, somehow, without too much effort. Lost a few friends too, without too much effort.

Lets just hope 2008 holds a better, brighter path.

And well, i realised another thing, the more i grow older, the more mature i become, and the less cheerful i am. Somehow, i've been getting better at emoing, and am smiling or laughing way less than usual. I miss the sec 1/2 days, when i could just be happy EVERYday.

Well, enough shit. Here's some resolutions that i might try to keep to.

1 - Balance schoolwork, st johns, guitar, semakau guiding, and whatever else i want to sign up for.
2 - Show those who really care that you appreciate them.
3 - Make sure you hold nothing back, anything you want to say, say, anything you want to do, do.

Yea, thats pretty much. Hm. Well, time to end this.

Basically, just do my best for everything, without neglecting anything.

Whee.

2008-01-01T18:16:00.000+08:00

First post of the year, is an UPDATES post. Hahaha.

29, 30, 31 of dec, was senior's cohesion! Met up with the squad at the mrt, met zhiying and yujia on the train, went to the ntuc to buy drinks while they went to mini toons to find stuff. Met cheryl on the way out of ntuc, met hui wen and hua xin, after cheryl went off, went back to the mrt, and met qingyi yahui. Everyone scattered after a while, until we all met up again, at a way later than planned time.

But on the activities itself! Super cool, lets list the stuff we did. DnD was rather cool, seeing everyone in formal clothes. Guys finished changing damn fast, so we just waited there. Guys room was cool, everyone was in white, minus sir cheehoe, until a while later, when the older seniors came. Quite cool, after asking the other pair out, there was some catwalk thing, or maybe that was later. Then, there was dinner, and photos. Food was good! Lots of nice stuff, then, we drank from those wine cups, haha. Then, we had sir dickson and sir kk to play the guitar, with others singing, guang huai fang shi, way back into love, and an avril lavigne song which i cannot remember. Quite cool, then we had our swearing in, and a gay part of it, where they asked us questions and it was torture, haha.

Then, onto night activities, like bingo, card games, mahjong and the best one of all, saboteur. Haha, all the way till the next morning, then i slept for a while. Some didn't sleep at all, some slept a lot. Next morning, went down for breakfast with some of the seniors, continued the games, then, played ball games, in the evening, right before it rained. Spoilt the bbq plans, made us move up and down, trying to find a place. Thank god, in the end, the sky cleared, and the bbq was not bad! Haha.

Didn't eat much though, but wasn't that hungry anyway. Night was supposed to be movie watching, watched a horror movie, then white chicks, but i fell asleep.

Woke up the next day, cleared up, went for breakfast, went home.

Night, was countdown with the gang. Freaking gay, we had vodka, and orange juice, which they mixed and drank. I couldn't take alcohol, so i skipped it, after drinking two sips. Went to happy new year everyone, walked from ecp, to the lagoon, back to the ecp, to tanjong rhu dhs, to kg arang, to clifford pier. And killed our legs, but the 8 minutes of fireworks or so, was so worth it. Caught it all on my camera, and it looks really really brilliant. Went to ho's house later, played, slept, and did random stuff through the night. And then, it was the usual poker in the morning with super nice pancakes by his mum with super nice maple syrup. Went out for lunch later, and went home!

Well,

2007-12-31T16:01:00.000+08:00

Well, a year has passed, its 31st december, i'll probably be out at night, so end of the year post starts tomorrow, or maybe a new year post. Hm, lets wait and see.

Whee.

2007-12-29T10:05:00.000+08:00

Some more updates. 24th and 25th, was christmas eve and christmas! Nothing exciting happened, except a giant smc dinner on the 24th night, sec2s, sec3s and us! Haha, steamboating was rather fun tho. Then the five of us, cheryl, xinyi, jocelyn, me, weisong went to watch I am legend! Pretty cool movie, elaborations later. Movie screwed up at the start, first there was no sound, with a running picture, then there was nothing!, then we had i am legend with alvin and the chipmunks sounds. Funny, haha. Then, the proper movie, and we went home, at around 12 plus. Haha.

25th, went out with my mum to go shopping, for stuff, met elvina, and hs saw us. No other interesting things happened.

26th, guitar camp day 1! Fun, learnt in the childhood, and then ate lunch, practiced a bit more, then played ball games, captain's ball, and badminton!

27th, orientation prep and guitar camp day 2, which meant that i had to skip one of them, and guitar was the unlucky one, i guess. Did all the prep stuff, ended with a sunburn. Rushed off afterwards, met with the usuals, haha. Jia hui, mabel, ting pei, yuan wei and joshua. Watched i am legend again! cos the tix for national treasure ran out. Good movie, as usual. Haha. Talked a lot in the macs afterwards, finishing at 11.30, and going home.

28th, was orientation prep and guitar camp day 3, as usual, guitar was skipped. Other than the christmas lunch, which was rather cool! Apple pie and chicken, freaking nice! Gift exchange, i got jade's biscuits, some std1 got my gift. Nothing much, finished, and rushed off for guitar bbq! Super fun, first bbq where we ate so much. Satay was good, sambal sotong was good, stingray was good, marshmallows were good, especially, on the grill, and melted like crazy, or on a piece of bread! Cycled a bit, then went off.

Oh right, postings revealed, i'm the dyso! And a part of smc3. Hm.

Why?

2007-12-25T01:40:00.000+08:00

Why the heck is it so hard to forget?

Stop thinking about her.

There

2007-12-23T22:59:00.000+08:00

Then, after a while, set off for CHEK JAWA! Yep, awesome trip, with the same awesome people. Grace, camelia, simin, and the other girl, eunice! Quite cool, saw lots of stuff again, some repeated, some new. Then there's this part of the walk, when we reached this super gay muddy area. Stepped in and sank all the way. Camelia fell, and lost her soles. Grace almost fell a few times, as did i. Crazy.

Didn't take as many photos this time, though it looks really cool. Still the same old horseshoe crabs! Sea anemones, sea coins, sea stars of the cake, sea cucumbers of different varieties, fiddler crabs, soldier crabs, hermit crabs, flower crabs, dog whelks, some flatform cousin which i cannot remember the name of, mantis shrimp, carpet anemone, button shells, and more!

See more at tidechaser.blogspot.com, or wherediscoverybegins.blogspot.com! For more pictures and stuff!

Hey.

2007-12-23T22:52:00.000+08:00

I'm back from JNCO. And i survived on 5 hours and 45 minutes of night sleep in 4 days 3 nights. Not including naps randomly taken.

Well, sure was an eye opener for a senior. DS first day, almost killed me, running here and there. Thankful that cheryl took over sentry, swapped with her for the second day. Not that it made much difference in the end, cos sir jy talk ended at 2.30, finished the stuff about ds with cheryl at 3, bathed and went to sleep at 3.30. Still. Woke up early for hike, to do nothing much as medic, then cabbed back, to do orientation stuff.

Third day was less interesting, fourth day had sec, which brought back a heck load of memories of jnco. The best thing is, when we did the "we are stjohns full of pride" cheer, when everyone cheered together damn loudly, i really could feel it. We, truly, are stjohns full of pride.

Then, nothing much, lunch and home. reached at 3, didn't bother to sleep, did random stuff until 10, when i collapsed till 10 the next morning.

Well.

2007-12-16T17:02:00.000+08:00

It feels damn good to just let go of everything. Seems like holding on, was really wrong after all. After seeing soemthings today, i think, it doesn't matter even if i say i give up. Because there's no chance at all.

Maybe it was clear from the start, and i was just being stubborn. But well, i guess, its over.

Whoa.

2007-12-16T16:58:00.000+08:00

Heh. Just woke up not too long ago. Why? Cos i slept at 10am. Why? Cos of BIKE HIKE!

Something that seemed crazy as hell, when i first thought of it, but heck, we survived.

52 km, overnight, all the way from ecp to punggol jetty, and back. Crazy journey, super fun peaks and dips. Experience of a lifetime, until you go again next year! We'll be the ones planning this time, ahhh.

I seriously think it was really good! From meeting at 6, setting off at 8, finishing at 6.30. Whoa. Crazy! Tired as hell during the trip, though more of sleepy than tired tired. Yea, hope you understand haha.

Too bad more of the squadmates couldn't come along.

Went home later, fell asleep at the bus stop and missed my bus. Haha, took the second bus, and fell asleep on it, woke up at the correct stop! Whee.

Now there's even more stuff to prepare.

Updates.

2007-12-15T10:37:00.000+08:00

Again. As usual.

The updates are getting way less detailed, and less precise. Probably, i'm letting go of quite a lot of things, and am getting way lazier.

Well, there was work on wed, and orientation meeting. Talking to the guys at work is pretty fun, haha. Too bad that was the last day for this year at least. Went straight to orientation meeting, spent a long, long time doing things.

Then it was back to school, watching them do stuff, for the course day. Didn't do much until after lunch, then went to do an activation preview, aop stuff, sitting in with the groups. Then, celebrated mdm sheng lian's bday at NHQ, after the meeting. Went through all the details and stuff, ended at a crazy unearthly hour, which would be common in the camp, sigh. 11!

Friday! Nothing on! For once, so i went out. Lunch outside, went to cycle around ecp. Saw mudskippers on the beach! Super cute, watching them climb against the tide, at one of the places that extend out towards the sea. I like cycling alone, its cool. Haha, helps me think.

Then, went to cut hair, and go home.

Sat, also nothing, but there's bike hike later, and there's photoboards to finish. Well, well, well.

Choices. To be or not to be. That is the question. Hmm. I need more time to think!

And in other words, i think, i'm losing some of my passion for guitar, damn. Need to get it back, or else the concert's gonna kill me. Maybe its just too much time with sj, guitar has to give way. Hm.

I want lost songs!

Eh.

2007-12-13T00:16:00.001+08:00

I can't believe it really, but when i saw the knife today, i had this realy sick urge to just cut and see what happens.

I have no idea what the hell is wrong with me. I think i'm really going nuts.

Help.

Well.

2007-12-13T00:03:00.000+08:00

Its been so damned long since i last saw them, and i really want to go out with them again. But eh. Bike hike?! Meet at 6? Why? Damn.

Gotta miss my la group's dinner. Crap. You don't know how much i miss talking to you guys.

Gah. I'm sinking into emoness again.

And i don't think i'll last that long. Too much sacrifices, i don't know if i can take it.

Well.

2007-12-12T23:40:00.000+08:00

I can't wait for friday. Rest! Haha.

Hm.

2007-12-11T21:15:00.001+08:00

I've been thinking, maybe, after all these trying out. If it all fails, i think i'll just give up. Its so much better. For everyone. Well, yea.

I guess, i've given up. I don't want to try anymore. Its getting so damn bloody tiring.

Maybe it won't stop, but at least, i can stop bothering now.

I need to rest.

And to cycle to throw everything away.

Updates.

2007-12-11T21:10:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, was one tough day of work. Crazy moving of heavy books, and other stuff. 7 an hour though, its good motivation!

Then, rushed down to bedok, for the meeting. When it ended, decided some more stuff about the recce, before going back.

Today, was the recce, crazy! Hike, casevac, route march. It was one hell of a time too! Lunch was super fun, hike was pretty fun too. Route march! It rained, and it was super good. I love the rain!

Yea, thats pretty much all. Tomorrow's the crazy work again, then orientation meeting. Hm.

Meh.

2007-12-09T10:31:00.001+08:00

Wow, this has been one HECTIC week.

Not that its so bad, afterall.

Sunday, was recce! For the hike again, up and down the hill, almost killed us. Crazy, super hiong, i guess, need to train up pt standards!

On monday, went to ho's house, again. The usual fun and games, and the poker game! Haha, poker rocks my socks.

Then, squad chalet! Super super fun. Especially, all that asshole daidi, and the talk cock sessions. Damn, how can we forget that 3 royal flush in ONE game? And then, the guitar concert, which was rather cool! But damn, we missed out on the AA one.

Then, 7th. Was a guitar prac at kevin's house. from 9 to 5! Crazy but fun! Haha, learnt two songs. Over the rainbow and the entertainer.

8th was the pd, replacement for huiwen, cos her shoulder flash couldn't fit. I seemed to be stuck with this pd, every single year. Damn. Then, its a free dinner by the organisers, us and the std2s. Quite cool, haha. Then, we took sir jy's car back to school to have the seniors talk. This one was rather interesting, though. Lots of stuff.

And that brings us to today! Which, apparently, is my only free day, other than, christmas and christmas eve, and maybe precamp. Hmm. Shall cycle.

Random stuff.

2007-12-01T00:54:00.000+08:00

The song thing again!

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY ?
only one - yellowcard
one what?

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
runaways - anberlin
haha, maybe

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
park your car - the junior varsity
eh?

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
last christmas - jimmy eat world
last christmas was rather boring. so i guess, bored?

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
send my love to the dancefloor, i'll see you in hell (hey mister dj) - cobra starship
something to do with dance? hahahahaha. that'll be way weird.

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
see me through - rascal flatts
See me through, see me through
This aching heart has come so far
To be with you, see me through
With angel eyes, just look inside
At all this love I never want to lose
See me through

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
love will make you beautiful - the afters
HAHAHAHA.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
counting stars - sugarcult
Hey, I wanna crawl out of my skin
Apologize for all my sins
All the things I should have said to you
Hey, I can't make it go away
Over and over in my brain again
All the things I should have said to you

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
clocks - coldplay
i think about time? rather, lost time.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BESTIES?
pain - jimmy eat world
It takes my pain away

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
when you tell me that you love me - westlife, feat diana ross
well.... haha.

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
penny on the train track - ben kweller
I'm just a penny on the train track
Waitin' for my judgement day
sounds bad. haha.

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
did you get my message - jason mraz
Did you get my message, the one I left
While I was trying to condense everything
That I meant in a minute or less when I called to confess
And make all of my stresses go bye-bye

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU??
grey - yellowcard
grey? not sure, between good and bad, i guess. heh.

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
i write sins not tragedies - panic! at the disco
HAHAHA. did you see the mv? well that rocks my socky socks.

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
three flights up [instrumental] - yellowcard
pretty fitting? haha.

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
rule the world - take that
RULE THE WORLD. nah,
Yeah you and me we can ride on a star
If you stay with me girl
We can rule the world
Yeah you and me, we can light up the sky
If you stay by my side
We can rule the world

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
losing a whole year - third eye blind
yea, losing TIME. haha.

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
10 days late - third eye blind
eh? LOL.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
the importance of being idle - oasis
idling is GOOD! haha.

This one seemed pretty true. Minus a few. Kinda wow. Haha. Well, well, well...

More updates!

2007-12-01T00:42:00.000+08:00

Okay, yep. 28th! Team outing! Super funny. Met up at VIVO. Hell far away, but heck. Walked around at first, trying to decide what to do, went to pei tiffany for a while, then went to eat dinner at marche! Nice food. Talked a LOT. Haha, more to come on chalet nights. Now everyone knows manching's big secret. Hmm. Talked even more after that, at one of the decks upstairs. Quite cool. Discussed deinitiation, and other stuff. Haha, cool! AA overseas trip! Next year, hopefully. Waited for tiffany to go home. Reached damn late. 10+? 11?

29th. PD. Quite fun. Haha, kids were really crazy though. Some were damn AP. It was at the Jacob Ballas Children's Garden! So cool! Really want to go again, but need to find a kid below 12. Any volunteers? PD was cool, met sir jy's squadmate, bixian. Haha, damn damn cool. People were really nice too! Gave us food, and stuff. Some photos too. Kids were really fun to see, and play with haha. Then, took the bus back home. Realised that we went to eunos to take a bus to pass by my house. Quite funny, haha.

30th. Some meeting at the airport again, photoboard done, i guess. Then, dinner at the foodcourt. Talked a lot about random stuff today! Haha, fun fun.

Got my guitar, FINALLY. Thanks a lot to kevin (the instructor) too. He "delivered" it to my house! Finished playing guan huai fang shi, just one part that's a little weird. Next up, Top of the world. Haha, pop songs are so interesting.

Just some short updates?

2007-11-28T14:30:00.000+08:00

23rd was guitar, rather fun. Though i don't really know anyone, but heck! Joining guitar, getting my guitar soon.

24th was hanging banners in school. One whole day! Painting, hanging, finding places. Climbing into the log store to get logs. Built a super cool tripod with justin! Super cool, and sturdy! Haha.

Then, i forgot what happened. Until the 27th which was aop/meeting at the airport. Quite interesting i guess, the past few days.

A few bdays over, a few coming up. Well. Well. Well.

Whee!

2007-11-27T23:28:00.000+08:00

I guess I'm happy now! Just a little confused over some things, but all's well. I think. Haha.

And...

2007-11-24T22:08:00.000+08:00

I found myself asking myself.

Who will still bother next year? The year after that? Maybe 5 years down the road? 10? 20? When we're all old? Who will bother?

And I really couldn't think of anyone.

After all, all that's left are memories and photographs.

Hope has became SO pointless. I don't know why I keep trying anymore.

Probably should have said something about this being an emo post on top.

Then there's the next part.

I know why i make friends so easily. Yet, i have so few close friends.

I have way too high expectations of friends. The closer we are, the higher the expectations. When someone doesn't really match up, i feel as if the person doesn't care anymore. Then it drifts apart.

Sometimes, i just want to be less feeling, be more unfeeling. So i don't feel so bad, so depressed when something bad happens. Or more pessimistic, then i'll know that the bad thing would happen anyway! So it all works out.

Gah. Thats enough for one night.

And i really don't feel like saying more. Its a snowball effect i guess, the more i say, the worse it gets. Gah.

Grah.

2007-11-23T00:01:00.000+08:00

More updates.

20th. Cheryl's bday! Haha, nah, it was a late night meeting again. Finished the plans! Finally! Now to do them, and make the samples. Kinda crazy, but i really don't mind this com. Its pretty fun! Haha. This day was made even better by crazy laughter, of mdm xinying and sir jiannan. Wow, it was funny. Haha.

At the same time, before that, went to the library, borrowed more comics! And also to art friend. Hm, love that shop for all that art stuff. Kinda reminded me of POP though, cos i went there so often to get materials. Hmm.

Then 21st, didn't do much. I guess. Can't remember actually.

22nd. Went out with the usual gang AND MORE. Well, today was freaking awesome. Lets see... Ew, darren, daryl, me AND SAMH. Haha. We met up first. Super cool! Samh's freaking tall. He's like high 170s at least, visibly taller than me and daryl, a bit shorter than ew, darren, taller than geoff too! Wow. He's still skinny though.

Ate lunch first at tm foodcourt. I made a concoction of chilli and a little bit of soup. Samh drank that. Then, i added the honey sauce from my chicken, the black soy sauce, and the salad. To make KIMCHI! Haha, samh drank that too! Crazy.

Then, met with kevin and geoff. Went to play lan. For a freaking long time! Say 5-6 hours for them, around 4 for me. Cos my account ran out of money. Meh.

BF2, CS, and later some lame games! Haha, super funny. So much jokes and fun! I almost lost my voice in the middle too. Then, we went off again to eat dinner. Kevin left, so it was the six of us. Finished dinner. Wanted to go Yamaha to see guitar for me and bass for geoff. In the end, we didn't. Then, we went to Old Chang Kee to eat random stuff. Some of them bought bubbletea too, haha. Crazy. Talked a bit more, then went off, cos the train was here.

Hm. And here i am now.

Tomorrow's guitar! For the first time. Kinda got convinced by grace to go. Haha, so yea, might be joining. I think i will. No other cca for now anyway, even though i put down green club and culinary club. Lets just see how things go.

I'm hoping that guitar will continue through the block off period. I want something to do! Please!

Updates

2007-11-21T11:02:00.000+08:00

Okay, so there was a meeting on the 18th. On orientation. Again. And another one on the 20th. So yea, pretty much finished the plans, now to get on with more concrete stuff. Next meeting on sat, 24th!

Then, it was going to daryl's house on 19th. Super fun. Haha. Played lf2, tried to play system shock 2 again, but it hanged. Then more lf2. Then kevin went off, then dinner.

Then, a bit more lf2, some other games, watching of random stuff. And then, on to tv! Cos we were bored. So he took out this poker set thing in a silver suitcase. Super cool. Then we played texas hold'em. He had crazy luck at first. Straight flush! On the first game. So i lost. But then, the next few games, i either had straights or colours. And trashed him like crazy! Thank god for awesome luck! Haha.

We were also watching tv. Haha, American music awards, the xiao hua xiao cao thing, the monday mega movie which we still don't know the name of, and the tian tang niao. Haha, super funny. The xiao hua xiao cao thing was super funny, man, the names were awesome. There was one guy with the name, Hudsri something Ong Sky Naga. I swear! It was not made up, what kinda name is that? Not to laugh at him or anything, but its so weird. Its like parents now are naming their kids all kinds of funny things, including adding random letters to original names or what.

Yea. Thats pretty much all.

Last lecture

2007-11-21T10:58:00.000+08:00

http://blip.tv/file/470585

Thats the link to Randy Pausch's "Last Lecture", its awesome, and inspiring, so everyone should go watch! Its only 1 hour plus, but thats okay. Not like you have a lot of things to do these days anyway. So yea!

Whee!

Built to last.

2007-11-20T12:24:00.000+08:00

Whee!

"Built To Last"

I've looked for love in stranger places,
but never found someone like you.
Someone whose smile makes me feel I've been holding back,
and now there's nothing I can't do.

'Cause this is real, and this is good.
It warms the inside just like it should,
but most of all it's built to last.

All of our friends saw from the start.
So why didn't we believe it too?
Whoa yeah, now look where we are.
You're in my heart now.
And there's no escaping it for you.

'Cause this is real, and this is good.
It warms the inside just like it should,
but most of all it's built to last.

Walking on the hills that night with those fireworks and candlelight
You and I were made to get love right

'Cause this is real, and this is good.
It warms the inside just like it should,
but most of all it's built to last.

'Cause you are the sun in my universe,
considered the best when we've felt the worst
and most of all it's built to last.

Emo.

2007-11-18T00:00:00.000+08:00

Yea. Emo post.

Well, two different things to emo about.

One, the more proper reason shall be first!

I think i keep feeling it. Just sudden feelings. Over the lost of, well, everything! Classmates, squadmates. Everyone i pretty much cared for. Less interaction. I hope, hope, hope, i don't lose touch with them. Most precious people, yet, so hard to keep. In a way.

Hm. Well, in a few more weeks, this year would have ended, concluded junior high, with a hell lot of endings. Bittersweet. Sad knowing that its over, happy over how far you came together. Funny, how we reacted differently! POP was such a teary affair, while commencement was so, tearless? It wasn't exactly happy, or sad, just indifference? And tiredness. Love my class to bits tho, class chalet was really awesome!

Ah well, there's still squad chalet to look forward to! And seniors initiation, and gp essays, and semakauing, and jnco. Well, its the end of a chapter, and a beginning of another. Weird huh, its like sec3 all over again.

I pray hard, that it won't turn out like sec3. Some was really good, some was pretty downright crappy. Keep the good stuff, kick the bad stuff away.

And two. Well, one line. It still hurts to be forgottened. It really does.

Updates

2007-11-17T23:52:00.000+08:00

First the updates, then the emoness. Haha.

Nothing much anyway. Just a short meeting today. Discussed some stuff, chose our postings. Don't think i'll get the first. The second one was just to waste space! Cos, well, i won't ever get it with cheryl around, and i don't want to put admin as second choice lol. Then third choice was admin! Crap.

Please god, don't let me hit admin! Ah well, i'll just succumb to my fate later anyway.

Meh.

Gah.

2007-11-16T13:21:00.000+08:00

I think i'm going crazy again!

Haha, i'm high and sad.

Gah! Crazy! Emotions out of control! Lalala!

Its getting high, then realising that certain things are gone, then you go sad.

Its like a sin 10x graph, where the dips and peaks are so close to each other!

Haha, i'm looking through the vids and pics we took on bbq night. Damn, we should have taken more photos! That ting pei face one was seriously funny though. And the class photo!

Bleh. 3rd Dec is classes! Whee.

Whee

2007-11-15T14:50:00.000+08:00

Whoo. Time to blog about things. Family chalet! Was on the 11th. Caught up with cousins, played arcade games, cycled! like mad, bbq! and more fun. Just talk and fun.

Cycling was really cool. Saw the tidebreakers at pasir ris. Number 3. Coincidental? Haha. Saw horses!, went along the beach!, went all over, it was seriously fun. Got cut though, when i was looking backwards, and cycling. :(

BBQ was cool! Mass talk cock session! Haha.

That night, saw the 4i`06 people. And 2f`05? Haha, yea. They did talk to me though. Samantha and Keith. Quite weird. specially when you don't interact with them in normal school days.

Meh, then, 12th. Went to work. Then to school for the AOP. Went home with the seniors at 8! Haha. Quite cool. Then, sir weilong talked to us talked to us about dove. Cool! I'm interested too. Might be going.

Hm, then on to. CLASS CHALET! On the 13th! After work, went to hand in timesheet, saw cheryl at work! haha. Then went home, packed. Went to js's house. Met up with the rest, and left for the chalet!

First night, had. We went together, jh, mabel, tp, wynne, gloria, hf, geoff, joseph, js, and me. Joshua came later. First we had a talking session, first impressions and stuff. Kinda cool. Haha, then it was mahjong. Crazy mahjong sessions till the next morning. Started preping for school. Went to school as a class! Super cool! Haha. Seriously. Slept on the trains together, etc. Had breakfast on the train! Went to school. Slept through mr sng's speech, was really too tired. Saw the speeches, went through the videos, went through the 300+ pupils going up one by one.

Then, next. Class photo! Too many missing people though. Sadly. Then, food! Then, js, me, tp, pj, mianmian, set off for js's house to get the food.

Haha, super fun time there. The dog was chasing the girls. And i had to get it to stop licking them. Had to "protect" tp and pj from the dog. Mianmian was trying to scare the dog, and it seemed to work. Haha, so fun! Then, helped each other pack the stuff into the plastic bags and fend off the dog, leading to crazy amounts of crossing of legs and hands. Its like that entangling game, haha. Then, the three went off first. While me and js waited for the car to ferry the food over. Went passed the girls on the way there, and they didn't realise. Went up, packed the stuff. And locked the door. Waited for them to arrive and knock. Then, after they walked down, me and js opened the door. Haha, super funny.

Talked cock, and went for the bbq! Super fun, food was really good too. Some pictures, and stuff. Good food, good company. Man, that was great. Kinda sad, that tp, pj, mm, and mr ng left before the vballers came. Or else we could have a more complete class photo. :(. Should have left with them too, since i didn't do anything there later.

Ate the icecream, played a bit of bridge, watched a big of mahjong. Then, went to sleep. Woke up at 6.18, when js's leg was kicking me down. Woke up for real at 7, to find most people awake. Haha, preped up for going off. Said bye, went off with jiahui. The guy scolded us for leaving the grill behind. I hope he really did return it though. Went for the meeting, went to paya lebar first, then qy messaged to say it was at bedok.

Finished meeting, went home. Started blogging. Didn't bother to go again, cos it was 2. Reach at 3? Go home at 6+? Nah.

Bleh.

2007-11-10T20:37:00.000+08:00

Okay, updates. 8 Nov.

No work, so went out with joshua mei to the book fair! Tried finding people we know, but didn't see anyone, until we saw geoff. Haha, chatted a while before he went back to work. Seems kinda stressful, whoa. Kinda glad that i didn't get the job in the end.

So yea, found some books. Queued in the very long queue which didn't really take that long. Only bout 20 mins, which was super fast for a queue of that length. Well, saw wynne. Then went to the counters, saw mabel, jiahui, ngjiahui and lwt. Quite cool. Were predicting if we could get someone we know. In the end, mabel and jiahui were signalling us to go over. And then the guy asked if we were paying by blah, or blah. So we got there. Haha, quite cool though.

Imagine next time, when we are all grown up, then, we go to work, and see each other. Now that would be interesting, working together as adults, in the business world. Thats if we do remember each other then.

Hm. Then, 9 Nov. Was work, as usual in the morning. Helped jm a bit after work, cos i had time, and was waiting for him to eat lunch anyway. Office work is a killer.

Went to tampines this time, after work, cos 8 was the first bus. Quite cool. Haha, walked around like an idiot, with nothing to do, no one to pei him, and nothing better to do at home. So yea.

10 Nov. Today! Whoa. Meeting at 10 in the morning. Interesting i guess, time to start thinking. Blah, nothing to do afterwards! Went home. Was tired. Read books. Almost finished all three already. Guess its time to go borrowing again. Kevin's recommendations. Haha. Blah.

Shit. I realised, i have no life! I'm freaking bored at home, i don't have work, i have no free friends, or none that would go out with me. Blah. Nothing to do. Bored as hell.

At least my internet's fixed. I want to go cycling! Shall go tomorrow i guess. Hm, and jogging/running too. And finding more jobs to save up money to buy stuff i do want.

Family chalet tomorrow. Oh right. Shit. Cycling's gotta wait till tuesday after work i guess.

Whoa. Now, its time for fun and laughter! With myself. And whatever the internet provides. Crap, we should have gone to play some shit as the three of us before daryl had his obm. Now its a hellotta boredum. :(

Sudden.

2007-11-09T21:35:00.000+08:00

Sudden random change of mood.

Kinda emo, though i'm not really sad, when i should be.

I guess. We're not actually that close are we? We're just bonded by the fact that there were people like us that came together. Sometimes.

At other times, we aren't really so close, are we?

Yea, thats probably it. We're not close, but we're close by the fact that we exist as one.

Blah. Weird post. Refers to quite a few things, actually, pretty much everything.

Blah. Don't try to ask me about it. I think you know it yourself. Don't talk to me about this, anyway.

I don't really know anymore.

The last time i used to have a best friend kinda thing, was like pri 4. With leoson, haha. Now, i don't really think i have any best friends, kevin and daryl come close tho.

But still. You know, sometimes i guess, its good to have someone nice to talk to, anytime you need them. But i guess, thats pretty selfish isn't it? I dunno. I don't think i mind being talked to non-stop. Unless, it gets really irritating. When you keep repeating your points over and over again.

And i think thats kinda what i do right? Haha. Weird shit.

Huh. Kinda weird how this dragged so long a post. I was thinking of a one liner.

But maybe its free flow. Thoughts translated directly into words. Hm. Ah well.

*long pause*

I think i have forgottened. How it is like, to have someone to talk to anytime. Or maybe i never had anyone close to that. Maybe, maybe not. The past's kinda hazy now anyway. Its like, i'm forgetting so many things so fast.

Just some small details that tend to jump at me. Some. And everything else slowly fades away to oblivion.

And i kinda guess. I kinda don't want to forget.

*insert mental picture of certain people*

Yea, i get mental pictures from time to time while thinking. Its kinda cool.

You know what? I think i'm speaking in my brain as i type this out. Its weird! Haha.

And then, there's the people that you connected with before. But somehow or rather, (i wanted to type either yourself or the other party broke it) but i kinda realised that i am usually the one that kills any relationship, in the sense of friendships and stuff lar.

Yea, maybe. Maybe it wasn't ever meant to be huh? Some of them used to be so good though. Actually, who am i kidding. Its myself i'm talking to. All of them were good.

Then they all died. One by one. Boom. Boom. Boom.

Now this just sems weird. I'm having mental images of people turning into mushroom clouds of explosion. Like in those stupid cartoons, you know?

I want to hold on. But as i have tried before, and as i am trying now, i can't. Somehow, something gets the better of me (more like worse in these cases, haha), and makes me make the relationships worse. Ah well.

Thats life for me. I guess i can't stay close to the same person for long huh? Lets see now, longest longest friendship? I can't really remember. I can't really define it either. Weird. I have no idea what i count as a real friendship anymore.

Hm, this is kinda dragging a little long and incoherent. I shall talk to myself another time. Its kinda fun to type/talk these things out, you know? Its like... Having someone to talk to when you don't. And its pretty good self-entertainment too.

Blah. My right wrist is having a funny heaty sensation! Now this is weird.

And i rather go play something. Actually, i don't but hey! I'm full of surprises. Sometimes i even surprise myself.

Which proves that i have no idea what i actually am thinking. Unless i type these out. Which helps me sort out my thoughts kinda.

Its good seeing old friends again though. I can't wait to find some of them again, but heck, i never initiate anything nowadays do i? Time to make a change. I hope i really do it though, not just speak for fun.

Wow i started typing this like 15 minutes ago, and i'm still at it, even though i just said a few paragraphs above that i am ending this. Heck its fun, i'm bored, and this is good entertainment.

See? I'm good at self-entertaining, which is why i like to wait for people and not let people wait for me. Cos punctuality is my middle name, actually its not, but i think most of you already know. And i usually arrive like half an hour earlier. Its amazing how i survive with that. Haha, gotta thank my mum for waking me most of the time though.

This reminds me. My parents are really awesome, and i only started to appreciate and realise that now. Or partly, after my birthday, which was on the sixth if you didn't realise. And well, they're really nice. Gotta make up for the crap i gave them the past few years, now. See? I really did mature! Haha. And filial piety! Haha, good stuff, good values. And i kinda dare to speak up about some stuff now, like asking if they're okay and stuff, that i usually don't do. Kinda awesome.

But still kinda late, cos of some sad stuff, regarding my grandma. Hope she's okay though, cancer check on thursday, pray hard. Somehow, good people seem to suffer as much as the bad don't they? Hm, weird.

You know, these posts (this was typed earlier than the last paragraph and the "and filial piety" part) are really weird. I have no idea. It seems weird. But it clears the mind. And i'm having this funny pain to the right of my sternum notch. Is that how you spell it? I guess so, no squiggly red lines.

Squiggle. Quiggle? Was it? The neopet. Haha, reminded of some primary school stuff. Something about a mervin, or was it mervyn? Showing us stuff about neopets on the first or second or someday of the school, in the morning, in the canteen, holding up the paper like this, and i still remember how he looks!

Mental pictures, awesome. I love my brain sometimes. Creates these awesome pictures, but sometimes it starts screwing around with me, and starts randomly popping things into my head. Mostly scary stuff, like horrors and stuff. And i prefer not to think about it. Blah, *empties head*.

Wow, see how far this post has gone?

At this point, i wanted to list out anonymously all the friendships with people that died. But i realised, there's a heck load of them. Whoa. Thats kinda, screwed.

Makes me wonder though. What would it be like if all of them stayed that way. I guess, if the first few did, then the remaining wouldn't have happened. I think. Fate, funny, how it turns things around. You never know if something you did actually have an effect on anything at all!

*long pause again, this one longer than the one before*

There's a few that keeps recurring. Partly because i see those people more often than the others. And those i don't see anymore? They're kinda forgottened. Lost to the void in space/time/or space-time even. Haha.

Gah. I'm running out of things to talk to myself about. Amusing this was though. Might continue another time! Haha. Sudden, i started with it, and shall end, with it.

All of a sudden...

PS. Leaves you wondering right? Hahaha. I have no idea why i typed that, but it popped into my head, so its here.

PPS. If you think you're one of the people. Actually, don't bother trying to find me i guess. Its gone. Maybe something might start again, another time. Sooner or later, i'm bound to run into one of you all again. Then, maybe i will.

PPPS. Wow, that sounds pretty heartless. I guess i am, then. Haha. Weirdo.

2007-11-09T21:30:00.001+08:00

And and and. Looking back on some of them now, i can't believe i ever wrote that! Haha. Some surge or rush of sudden emotion. Blah. Haha.

2007-11-09T21:27:00.001+08:00

Sigh. When you have things you want to say, but can't say. Here or there. You type it out in notepad, and lock it up! Whee.

Today

2007-11-07T22:47:00.000+08:00

Was work again! Finished early, then they had to find stuff for me to do. Guess its okay. Office work doesn't seem that tough after all!

Haha. Lunch with joshua again. This time, aka today, we wore the same shirt lol, that white zippy thing. And jeans. Official dress code includes mandatory jeans. Ah cool.

Went to take 21 to pasir ris today. Borrowed a few good books, i think. Cell, by stephen king is an awesome apocalyptic horror. Through a glass, darkly, recommended by kevin! And Autumnquest, just because the cover's cool and the fonts rock. Yep.

And of course, more arcade. Gah. Wasting money like crazy. Hotd3! Shotgun pumping madness. Super fun! Haha. Love it love it. Hotd4! Smg. Gotten damn far today. For the first time in my entire life! Haha. And of course, other crazy stuff.

Killed my arm though, didn't have the strength to carry books lol. Haha. Ah well.

Tomorrow's a visit to the times book fair people! And to find books.

And one day closer to lost songs! :D

Extrapolation

2007-11-07T22:39:00.000+08:00

Extrapolation of the last post. On the bright side. I'm sixteen. NC16 movies, and whatnot. Haha.

And most importantly. I guessed i matured. Somewhat. Much more able to show care and concern for the family properly. Learning to treasure things better, especially some things, and people. Learning to appreciate the world more.

I'm finally able to do things that i didn't dare to do before. Or things i dreamt of. Courage i guess, in some cases. Now that i've got that, its time to start. Might be too late for certain things, but heck. Better to start late, then never. Right?

Time to go!

Righto.

2007-11-07T22:28:00.001+08:00

Bday post! One day late. Haha

So, wait. Shall list the things i did. Went to work till 12.30. Ate lunch with joshua mei. Took 65 to tampines. Played the arcade a bit. Went home. Celebrated with family. End.

Kinda boring. But i guess. Its quite a good and bad bday, with reference to certain things.

One thing though. I had no idea, whether to be happy that someone i didn't know wished me a happy bday or whether to be sad because people i know didn't wish me a happy bday. Hm.

Haha. Ah well. Look on the brighter side of things.
Here's a list of people who wished me happy bday. In order of time. The two who wished before the day itself, huaxin and huiwen. Then the midnight people or somewhere around there, kevin, weisong, js + sinyee, grace, liwen, wynne. Then the others for the day, lydia, justin (the cousin), jade + mae, leoson, shunying, yw, cheryl, liann, jocelyn, hengguang, yujia, elvina. And the last minutes, lwt and mabel, then the belated, zhiying.

Ah well. Some were pretty unexpected. But the most cool one, i guess, would be js's. Here's a chatlog! Haha.

[12:01:07 AM] jon!: heyhey!
[12:01:10 AM] ❤//ONEJAY: hello happy birthday! :D
[12:01:15 AM] jon!: HAPPY BIRTHDAY :D:D:D:D
[12:01:21 AM] s: hello
thanks haha
[12:01:30 AM] ❤//ONEJAY: happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you,
happy birthday to samchan, happy birthday to you!
LOL.
:/
[12:01:36 AM] jon!: ;D YOU DIDN'T EXPECT THIS RIGHT
[12:01:41 AM] s: haha thanks even tho i have no idea who you are
[12:01:42 AM] jon!: hahaha
[12:01:42 AM] s: yep
haha
[12:01:45 AM] ❤//ONEJAY: haha yep,
LOL
[12:01:50 AM] jon!: alright!
[12:01:54 AM] ❤//ONEJAY: omigosh i'm like a total stranger. o.o
[12:02:09 AM] s: yep haha
[12:02:18 AM] jon!: yeah but everyone's a stranger to everyone some ti
me in their lives

Cool stuff haha. And a few more things that made my day. :D

...

2007-11-05T18:42:00.000+08:00

You know what? This fever or faux fever is screwing around with my head. Seriously.

I'm bloody pissed off, easily irritated, and get pissed off at everything i see. I get emo ever so often, and am typing this out in complete darkness minus the light of my laptop.

I think i'm going crazy. The music is not helping at all. And i'm still bloody pissed off. I think i'll just go sleep.

Hopefully, tomorrow will be a much better day. Or maybe it'll be some screwed up day anyway. Birthdays never went well for me did they?

... Bleh. Its 5 hours and 15 minutes away. But whats there to expect? No expectations. No hopes, so nothing comes crashing down tomorrow. :D

Oh right.

2007-11-05T11:53:00.000+08:00

Get ready for some emo, and angsty posts following this up. Because there's quite a few things bugging me. And there's still the end-of-school post. And one more for regrets. And one for personal reflection.

More or less. Some others might be added, some removed. Hopefully. I'll get through with them when the mood is right.

Zzz

2007-11-05T11:39:00.000+08:00

Okay for the posts. Finally feel okay enough to start typing. Bleh.

Saturday, was bike hike test. Quite funny. Flunked it once, then had to retake, and get more practice. Or else, i'll die on the day itself. Hard to control tho, that bike, so it might not be so hard.

Then, went with cheryl, sj and 940 to eat lunch, and help sj find his bag. Lunch was expensive. Haha, and not very nice i would say, the chicken was way too hard. Then, walked around bugis street for a quite a while, before going back to the first shop for sj to get his bag. Haha, then went home with cheryl on the mrt, while sj and 940 went home by bus. Quite an interesting way back i guess. Seems like there are some other classes, that had people cry, and something about the geppers, non-geppers thing, that we had at the start of year3. Hm. More on that another time.

Then, sunday. Went to daryl's house again. This time, went to pr to take bus with kevin. Played music from the laptop! Haha, quite cool, tho. Then, when we reached it was around 3+, 4. Tried to finish bioshock. But the xbox screwed up. And the helpline only opens on monday to fridays. Kinda crap. PS2 controllers were in his brother's classmate house as well! So, we were kinda stuck with coms. Went into his room. Played system shock 2. Before getting bored, and the game crashing on us.

So, we discovered something else! A little something by the name of Little Fighter 2. Haha. That was so damn fun. First, we couldn't connect through the coms, so in the end, we blasted music from my laptop, while playing on his desktop. 3 people squeezing into one keyboard is not funny. Haha, but later, played so many funny games. With the super fast mode, running at each other mode, and oters. Freaking hilarious, can't be described in words, and neither do i want to try. Just another one of the good times.

Funny. How we weren't that close in sec2. Yet, when they left for their IPs, we became so close. Haha, and because of the crazy trips in last year's novdec hols. Kinda stuck us with each other, and crazy fun times bonded us together. Haha.

And then, yea, went home. Reached home, got knocked out by my combination of flu, sore throat, and possible fever. Kinda killed me. Super bad time too. What? Right before i start working, and right before my birthday. Crappy. Crappy.

Hm, feeling better now anyway, thats why there's this post. Still have this crappy headache, and this crappy sorethroat tho.

Emo.

2007-11-03T19:53:00.000+08:00

Maybe i do randomly think a lot.

Thought of this one incident. Then the reality finally sunk it fully. And hit me hard. 4j is gone. 3j was long gone. And you know what? I wont lie by saying i'll miss everyone equally. But i'll miss everyone. Just some more than the others.

I'll really really miss you, you, you, you, and you. Because life's like that. Everything we did together, all that stupid gossip sessions and stuff. At the airport, at all your houses, except for you. Yep.

And the rest. Most of you, i'll miss quite a lot too. All the stupid things we did. All the fun stuff. The level camps. And all we have left, are just photos, and bits and pieces of memories.

And the last few? I'm sorry i didn't take the effort to get to know you. And i don't really care that much either. Sorry. But perhaps we jsut don't get along, and never had the chance to get to know each other anyway.

I'll miss you all. And i think i am emoing now. Haha.

Maybe i'll even end up crying later.

All these. From one single incident that suddenly sparked my mind. Setting off a crazy chain reaction. Crap. Typing this out, made me think of even more.

Not really the kind of end-of-school-term post, but hey. Thats all i'll give for now.

2007-11-03T08:31:00.001+08:00

You know what? I think i actually kinda miss 3j more than i miss 4j.

I'm sorry but its true.

2007-11-03T03:18:00.000+08:00

Can't believe that we were so close. Yet. So far. Damnit.

Seems like i'm just god's plaything. God's source of entertainment. God's practical joke.

April fools, idiot. Its November.

2007-11-02T19:10:00.000+08:00

Last day of school didn't feel anything like the last day of school. Was expecting sadness, but it never came. At least, not until pj went around hugging people. Maybe something happened then, but there wasn't enough. Or maybe it just reminded me too much of the day after pop. Haha.

Ah well. We'll still see each other on the 14th. And next two years. So... Well.

I've been looking at pictures, see how much we changed, and grew. Its kinda amazing really.

Back on topic. Kevin came! And didn't really do much. Spring cleaning.

Saw the band play. Quite damn cool. Js was super funny. Playing with his lollipop. Geoff too. Haha. Nice songs though. Same for the other year 5 one. Awesome!

And well, went to get our jobs at tampines later, with joshua. Start work on my bday! Wow, yay.

Saw cheryl working at delifrance. Haha, quite funny. Cos she was just standing there. Don't think she saw me tho.

And wow. Checked the gp groupings. Group 50! Only know yiwei, and roy. Hm.

Group 49 had cheryl and daphne leh. Where got so tyco! Haha.

:X

2007-11-01T22:42:00.000+08:00

Wow. And tomorrow marks the end of this school term. I have no idea to be happy or sad.

My brain's a very weird mix, of nostalgia, regret, happiness, sadness, anger, indifference, anticipation, dread, fear, joy, calm, and worries now. Pardon me if i do anything weird tomorrow. Domo Arigato.

blah.

2007-11-01T21:17:00.000+08:00

Daily Happenings again.

Yesterday! Was HCL O levels, and halloween. And hellgate opening launch. Thats what i went for with kevin and daryl. Ho left early, so we reached early and slacked around, watching the demo. Then we got bored, and went up to play halo3 on easy! Freaking fun/funny. Mutual killing while fighting crazy enemies. Fun, went down to find kevin later. Watched a bit more. Then, went to eat lunch at pastamania. Shared 2 pizzas. Quite fun, talked cock, showed photos.

Then we went to play! Lvl 22 guardian! Sitting beside ho was this cedar girl, quite cool. Rocket launcher thing! Damn cool, haha. Just ran around whacking things. Then i played a bit, and the network server cut me off. :(

Then we went to do some survey, got a postcard, then went off to daryl's house. Played bioshock. Some freaky shyt, with the freaky music from the clown machines, and the freaky dead bodies. The art gallery one has to be the worse. And the starting.

Whee, went home at 10+. Reached home after 11. Pretty screwed up haha.

Then today. Went to school for mock un. Didn't do much actually. Blah, it ended, then, we went to the foyer, and waited a long time, to see when to watch movies. Speedcubing all the way, 3.17 is my best record so far! Then, after a long while, we finally went to watch stardust! at bugis. Oh boy, Stardust really rocks. Such a perfect fantasy, such a perfect romance story. Haha, awesome story. Loved the part when captain shakespeare was dancing, and septius came in. Haha! Awesome! Loved the multiple chases scene. Loved the seven brothers! Loved the song at the credits!

Yea, watched it with, jiahui, gladine, js, jm, yw, wynne, mian2, shunying.

Really really good show. Somehow. Love the ending song.

Was super cold, the toilet had this super cold air vent or something. Kept blowing cold air! Haha. Everyone said it was cold.

Went to kino later. Comics and stuff. And books. Then, went on to the meeting. And dinner. Met justin even before they came. Then, ate dinner with cheryl, zhiying, and huaxin. With justin watching, until yian came then he went to eat with her. Haha. Meeting, quite a few things. Some funny stuff. Haha.

Then went home quite late. Started talking about everything again. JNCO, SNCO, etc. Hahaha. Fun times. Fun times...

Hm.

2007-10-31T11:39:00.000+08:00

I don't think i have a favorite song. Just a song that i link to each occasion.

Funny how music is made, yet it seems so real? Like movies, television. Just your fantasies being played out right before your eyes, with you knowing that they can never come true, but heck, how awesome would it be if it could.

Blah. Random post for a random day. Going out with ho and seet later! Gonna check out hellgate!

Another thing, what do you put if you want to place an exclamation mark together with a comma? There's nothing that fits right? Except an exclamation mark and a new sentence.

Hm.

2007-10-30T23:22:00.000+08:00

Yep, so here i am again. Bloody bored.

Went to school today! For absolutely nothing, except a period of Bio. Thats one period of Bio, 30 mins, when we were released at 12.45.

Why? Cos triple chinese means nothing. Then recess. Then bio. Then double geog that got taken over by chinese. Then single maths that got taken over by chinese.

Yep. Spent a lot of time doing nothing. Which was rather nice, once in a while. Talking to people too. Was talking about subject combis, with many different people over a long while. Charted out everyone's combi! Bio seems to have more people than Physics! Wow. Kinda amazing. But hey, its okay. Hopefully, i'll end up with more people i know. Other than those confirmed :D. And hopefully some of the others. Really praying hard tho, next two years. I guess i just need the environment to be right to study better? Haha.

Um. Then there's the going home? And nothing much. Went crazy on msn, for no apparent reason, was super random and stuff. Ask js, ho or seet. Haha.

Then, i smsed the class and the squadmates, and a few lucky others, to wish them good luck for the O levels. I seemed to have missed out some people. Cos, i should have smsed 36 out, but only did 33. So yep. Sorry if you didn't get the message. Ah well. Good luck again, to whoever's reading this before their exams, which shouldn't actually be possible. Its tomorrow, and i'm still typing the post at 11.30 and plan to do a quiz too. So yea.

Level 1
( ) smoked a cigarette
( ) smoked a cigar; would die before i can even puff the second breath out
( ) done weed
( ) kissed a member of the same sex; eh? guys would never do that
(x) drank alcohol ;i hope jolly shandy counts
Total : 1

Level 2
(x) been in love ;what i think love is, at least
(x) been dumped; somewhat? haha.
(x) shoplifted ;once, when i was really really young, and all i took was a 30 cents pack of twisties. the method was pure genious tho. ;D
( ) been fired.
(x) been in a fist fight ;funny ones, haha.
Total :4

Level 3
(x) snuck out of parent's house
(x) had feelings for someone who didn't have them back?
( ) been arrested.
( ) made out with a stranger.
( ) gone out on a blind date!
Total : 2

Level 4
(x) had a crush on an older person ;in the sense of birthdays, well yes.
(x) skipped school ;accidentally? haha, woke up really late
( ) slept with a co-worker
(x) seen someone/something die ;in a way
Total :3.

Level 5
( ) had/have a crush on one of your FRIENDSTER friends
( ) been to Paris. ;wouldn't mind tho.
( ) been to Spain.
(x) been on a plane
( ) thrown out for drinking
Total :1

Level 6
(x) eaten Sushi
( ) been snowboarding
( ) met someone BECAUSE of myspace .
( ) been mosh pitting
Total : 1

Level 7
( ) been in an abusive relationship.
( ) taken pain killers.
(x) love/like someone right now ;i think. at least.
(x) laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
( ) made a snow angel/snowman!
Total : 2

Level 8
( ) had a tea party.
(x) flown a kite
(x) built a sand castle
(x) gone puddle jumping
( ) played dress up
total : 3

Level 9
(x) jumped into a pile of leaves
( ) gone sledding!
(x) cheated while playing a game
(x) been lonely
(x) fallen asleep at work/school
Total : 4

Level 10
( ) used a fake/someone else's ID
(x) watched the sun set ;still the closest thing to heaven on earth
(x) felt an earthquake
( ) killed a snake

Total : 2

Level 11
(x) been tickled
(x) been robbed/ been vandalized ;wallets stealing!
(x) robbed someone ;wallets stealing!
(x) been misunderstood
( ) pet a reindeer
Total : 4

Level 12
(x) won a contest!
( ) been suspended from school
( ) had detention(:
( ) been in a car/motorcycle accident. ;too many close calls tho.
Total : 1

Level 13
( ) had/have braces
( ) eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night?
(x) had deja vu
(x) danced in the moonlight ;in a sense, yes.
Total : 2

Level 14
(x) hated the way you look
(x) witnessed a crime
( ) pole danced .
(x) questioned your heart ;and i still am
( ) been obsessed with post-it notes
Total : 3

Level 15
(x) squished barefoot through the mud
(x) been lost
( ) been to the opposite side of the world
(x) swam in the ocean? ;pacific! at new zealand!
(x) felt like you were dying ;even more so this year
Total : 4

Level 16
(x) cried yourself to sleep
(x) played cops and robbers ;some version of it
(x) recently coloured with crayons/colour redpencils/markers
( ) sang karaoke ;yes me is karoke noob
(x) paid for a meal with only coins
Total : 4

Level 17
(x) done something you told yourself you wouldn't
( ) made prank phone calls
(x) laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
( ) kissed in the rain
Total : 2

Level 18
( ) written a letter to Santa Clause
( ) been kissed under a mistletoe .
(x) watched the sun set with someone you care/cared about. ;too many people that i care about
(x) blown bubbles
( ) made a bonfire on the beach ;elsewhere, not the beach.
Total : 2

Level 19
( ) crashed a party
(x) have traveled more than 5 days with a car full of people ;yea! newzealand counts. i hope. or level camps
( ) gone roller skating/ blading
(x) had a wish come true ;well once or twice
( ) Humped a monkey
Total : 2

Level 20
( ) worn pearls
(x) jumped off a bridge.
( ) screamed "penis" at a football game.
( ) swimming with dolphins
Total : 1

Level 21
( ) got your tongue stuck to a pole/freezer/ic e cube.
( ) kissed a fish.
( ) bought the opposite sex clothes
( ) Sat on a roof top ;i want! standing would be more cool!
Total : 0

Level 22
( ) screamed at the top of your lungs. ;never had the time, or the place
( ) can do a one-handed cartwheel
(x) talked on the phone for more than 3 hours ;once. once upon a time.
(x) stayed up all night ;heh, anyone one of the following, chalets, camps, etc.
Total : 2

Level 23
( ) picked and ate an apple right off the tree
(x) climbed a tree ;ones in dhs
( ) had/been in a tree house
( ) aren't scared to watch scary movies alone ;i have no guts. haha.
Total : 1

Level 25
( ) believe in ghosts ;no idea
( ) have/had more than 30 pairs of shoes
( ) gone streaking
( ) been in jail
Total : 0

51 crazy things. From kevin. Ah. Nothing to do now, but sleep! :D

One final good luck!
i think i miss seeing you, and you saying hi to me.

Lalala.

2007-10-29T22:27:00.000+08:00

Well, school's been normal. But that's not the point of this post so... SKIP!

First things first. I kinda planned and thought out what to post for the end of school year post. Cos well, i had certain inspiration from certain somewheres. Well, its kinda depressing, but more happy than i thought it would be. Haha.

Second. Js's thoughtful posts, one of the certain somewheres for the above, and also what sparked off quite a bit of thought. Yea, yea, the bathroom thing too. Cos i read it just before i bathed, and i thought about it. Quite cool. Haha.

I realised. That i am a person that likes to listen. Just listen a lot, without speaking much. Because thats the way i am! Haha. So i would, in theory, be a good listening ear, if anyone bothered to say their troubles to me. Next, added to the fact that i only talk when i have something to say, or when the silence is straining, or when the person is someone special, in the sense that i want to talk to or haven't talked to in a long while. And a few other examples, but that was one heck of a run on line and i rather not continue. So yes, thats a reason to why i am quiet, its not because i don't feel in or anything, its just that, i have nothing better to say, and i would rather listen.

Added to that, i think a lot. Which means i kinda zone out, and stare at something to make it blurry and stuff. Which is quite cool, and quite helpful, when you lose touch of all the senses, and just let your brain process thoughts, and nothing but thoughts.

Next line's gonna sound like some super nice guy, which i am not. So yea, i kinda suck as a nice guy anyway, i try but fail. :D. I think i care about people more than i care about myself. Yep, somehow, i am more affected by what happens to the people around me, and the people i care for, than if something happens to myself. Thus, if i feel sad, it usually doesn't impact as much as certain people feeling sad. Up to you to interpret who the certain people are. Maybe its just some high empathy. Which is why i can't let myself be talked to by those charity people, cos once they start, i feel compelled to donate, because. And thats partly why i like CIP anyway, those that directly make an impact on a person's life. I don't really care if its just one person, its still better than holding any other events that help promote awareness, because, i can't tell if it really worked that way. Maybe its best to combine both. Haha.

Next. I think i am overly sensitive. To things, to events, to people around me. Makes me misinterpret way too many things, haha. Which makes things kinda weird, and makes me feel stupid afterwards. Quite fun though. Haha, seeing how badly you were wrong, or how big you blown up the matter to be, when it was nothing at all.

Blah. I got bored of blogging, and am now talking on msn, and don't really plan to stop soon. So too bad. Blog, sorry for neglecting you for now.

To Be Continued...

Time

2007-10-27T14:21:00.001+08:00

Another thing we talked about. Time.

Is it really speeding up? Accelerating so fast, that it passes by so fast, that everything is but a blur?

Time really flies now. And it doesn't slow down, or maintain its speed. It goes faster and faster. Been noticing it since last year. In sec1/2 time was slow, it was good. Year 3 flew pass, Year 4 is flying pass even faster now.

Is it the stress levels? The pace of life?

Then in that case, i say we slow down. I don't want things to end so fast.

I still want to go to school.

Whee.

2007-10-27T09:19:00.000+08:00

With friends like these...

Awesome day yesterday, last night and this morning. Just plain awesome.

First was hike recce, went around bukit timah, died climbing up the steps. Did something like my team's jnco route, quite cool. Tough tho, guess i've became weak after the lack of exercise. Crazy climbing up of steps, roughly 100 for each part, quite cool. Haha. Crazy and fun.

Finished the thing, sat around, then rushed down to parkway to meet the gang. Haha. Me, daryl, kevin, geoff, joseph, darren, ew, js! Supposed to celebrate their belated bday, which was on the 24th. Which would have been celebrated on the 22nd, if daryl didn't screw his leg up. Haha.

Played the arcade at first, fun games! Some shooting stuff. Then some test the strength stuff, that js ALMOST got the high score on. The drum game between kevin and js. Js owned, so expected of a drummer. Then played the stepping game. 8 people, 8 circles! Haha, freaking funny. Owned the game. Especially the massive lights part, all 8 light up repeatedly.

Went to Sakae to eat, because Sakura closed down and the website still didn't mention anything. Damn. Ate, in the end, around 50 plates for 4 people. Me, daryl, kevin, geoff sat at the same table. Darren, ew, js and joseph shared the other table. The tables were far from each other, so we played with the teabags, and sent each other messages. Quite funny, haha.

Went off to katong mall later. To play lan, haha. Quite fun. Played lots of funny games. I do suck though. Haha.

Then on to joseph's house to play lan. When daryl was calling his mom to tell her that he was staying over. I was crazily niaoing him, speaking in a gay voice with daryl, don't need lie, daryl, please stay over, etc. With kevin or js alongside haha. In the end, the Wii games didn't allow for two player, except Wii sports, so we took turns. Quite fun. In the end, they left round 10+, 11. Me, kevin, daryl stayed over. Switched through all his games. Went to eat dinner at 12am. Haha. Reached back at 1. Played till 3+ before i got knocked out. Slept a bit, everyone slept. Kevin completed the game on his own. Then, we woke up, and it was 5. Played a bit more till 6.

Went to eat breakfast! Just the three of us again. Haha, awesome gang. I love them so much :D. Crazily good friends we are. Got lost at first, just walked around, in the middle of the road. That was how life was supposed to be. And I seriously thank god for friends like them.

Super fun. Talked and ate breakfast at macdonalds. Talked about every single imaginable topic, super fun, super funny. Talked about people, talked about the past, talked about the present, talked about school, talked about games, talked about the future. Etc. Crazy fun. Left at 8 or so. Walked to the bus stop. Grey skies. Took the bus home. Reached home. Got drenched like mad. And once i reached, the rain stopped.

Whoo. Good times like these deserved to be remembered for life. Good friends? For eternity. Next up, stayover at daryl's house. Sometime soon, i hope. More fun, more games, more crazy talking. Haha.

EH.

2007-10-25T23:06:00.000+08:00

Preparing for the mood for the end of year post.

Guess its gonna be a pretty bad post. Don't feel bad about it. This year was pretty bad, not due to anyone's fault, but the addition of everything together. Well. More on that another time.

Well.

2007-10-25T22:24:00.000+08:00

Wed was a normal day. Boring as usual. After school had AOP meeting, was kinda late for it already, so just rushed to 1I. Meeting was till quite late, 7+ i think. And it didn't even finish. Grah, went home with cheryl, qy and adie.

Oh yea we got our paperweight back anyway! Yay, i like mine a lot. Amberish yellow with 2 orange and 2 white petals arranged in the same of a butterfly, supposedly. Haha. Too bad i don't like the containers they used. made it look kinda weird.

La was watching of simpsons! And parts of plan 9 from outer space, the crappiest movie ever made.

Knew results too. Thank god, i got above 3.2! Yay, no need for appeals. Guess its pretty good, but when you compare it in my class, its probably crap. With lots of people in the class scoring 3.8 and above, what can you say? I guess, to all those who don't like it when the overachievers complain, then think. They've got the standard so they set themselves higher up. Its all up to you to measure yourself to what your goals are. So there's nothing much to complain about when the others complain. Grah. Unless the person has a GPA of 4, then its a whole new story altogether.

Next day. Today, GEOG FIELD TRIP! Yay. Beach was really, really, really fun. I guess its a part of me, to love nature, even though its artificial and dirty. Ah well, loves. Played with sand, with sea, etc. Fun times. Took loadsa photos. Scenery mostly. And with that plank of wood. And got two pretty pretty shells. One's a conical green and pink. One's a diamond/scallop shaped, but higher in the middle than the sides.

Then, was bio. No results for the DNA thing. Sadly. Too thick agarose.

Then was chinese. Loads of fun with JS walking around. Four corners of dunman high! And a few other random places, before we ended up in the library. Blah. Ate lunch with zhiying daphne and yujia. Went home with daphne cos the other two took bus.

Grah, back at home. Having this crazy painful headache. Feels like the built-up of pressure or something.

2007-10-23T23:19:00.000+08:00

You don't know how happy you make me, whenever we talk, or anything. Be it one line or two.

Too bad tho.

True friends are really great. Haha, went crazy with daryl and kevin last night. Shuffle your music player, and ask it a question. Shuffle, get the song name, interpret for the answer. Damn fun. Lots of questions asked, stupid, dumb, and anything you could possibly imagine. For like, 2 hours or so.

Can't wait for the 26th.

Help!

2007-10-22T23:21:00.001+08:00

Mr Chia shared something on global dimming. So might as well share it here.

Hopefully we'll stop this disaster before its too late.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Global_dimming
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Global_warming

Yea. According to that documentary, global dimming masks the effects of global warming. So global warming's effects are actually way more serious than people thought. And now with global dimming being reduced, global warming's accelerated.

By 2025, temperatures will rise by a projected 2 degrees. This will cause forest fires in most parts of the world, causing release of even more CO2, causing greater global warming. This is the end, because the continual rise will increase faster and faster. By 2050, the temperatures will rise by likely 5 degrees, causing these methane-compounds under the sea to melt, causing release of crazy amounts of greenhouse gases, greatly accelerating global warming.

By 2100, temperatures will rise by a probable 10 degrees. Everywhere will be transformed, desertification would be probable. The heat would kill, as would the flooding caused by the melting of the ice caps and whatever huge ice mass. Singapore would probably be long gone, a small tsunami or rise in sea level would cover us up. We would be the new atlantis.

So what are we waiting for? The world to end? Somehow we have to stop this crazy global warming, by 2025. Before its too late!

But hey, what can we do? We are just mere citizens.

Me and Js thought of this cool plan though, if we planted trees on satellites, surrounded by a material that allows quick diffusion, and send them orbiting around the earth's atmosphere, they would take in the CO2, and release oxygen. Combating the increase in CO2, and since its orbiting the earth, sunlight would be ever present. We could even coat the domes of whatever material with some reflective things to reflect some of the sunlight back.

Gah, i just want the world to survive a little longer.

Zzz

2007-10-22T18:54:00.000+08:00

Random outing on sunday with kevin. Quite fun. Haha, saw some experience people. One of his juniors was there or something. Recognised him and in the end, made us buy the postcards. Quite cool i guess.

Later, just walked around. Lamed around, went to white sands after that. Just wasted time walking around. Played HOTD3. Quite fun. Haha.

Then nothing much, went home pretty soon.

Today was just some lame day. 4h and 4g appeared to have moved classes tho. Haha, weird. Had this PSC scholarship talk. Boring at first, later became better i guess. Interesting speaker tho. Blah, had this bio lecture afterwards. Quite interesting, can't wait for the practical!

And yea, went home after that.

Alright.

2007-10-20T23:07:00.000+08:00

Friday was YWC. Which was rather slack and boring. Haha.

Reached school. Didn't do much. Slack around. Slack around more. Ushers mainly moved around and did nothing. Went with all the ushers at first. Then later, we didn't usher cos the receptionists did a very good job! Haha. So we sneaked into the LT, went to this cool hole in the back. After a while, got scolded by Mrs Shu, went out.

Walked around. After a while of waiting, it was lunch. Was the first to eat! After the GOHs, and the other school peeps. The food's pretty good. Blah, blah. Fast forward, food not finished. Gave out to random people. Later, filled drinks and passed to the facils of Xperience, walking around. Quite the fun. Heard how rowdy the year2s were. Joshua went to shout at them or something. Haha. Quite the funny.

Blah blah, fast forward. Watched 4E presentation. Used too much terms that the year2s don't understand i guess. And mistake of iron2/3 cations and sine/cosine curves. Haha. Then went down, talked to the group presenting later, our class's. Blah blah.

Rah, halfway, we were called to give out the doorgifts. Gave out. Blahblah. Finished.

Had a meeting with my team later. Didn't really do much, haha. Since we met in the canteen, then didn't have a good enough map or recce yet. Went to the library, couldn't find any better maps, or info. In the end, gave up. Saw cheryl there also, before she went down to meet her group. Saw grace also, ms wang replied, so the semakau thing is on! Haha, pretty cool.

In the end, we gave up. And started talking alot of stuff. Went to the sj room. Quite a bit changed, etc. Talked a lot, from 4 to 6. About their experience, things, etc. Haha, pretty fun.

There's so much that can't be written here, because its not password protected. Gah. And i can't be bothered to make a private blog too, so it'll probably end up in one of the locked up notepads on the laptop. Haha.

Sat. Walked to school. Felt really weird wearing jeans. And really hot too. Sun shining bright, and a black anco tee does not pei.

Sir jy talk, quite different from what i thought would happen, but interesting none the less, quite inspiring and scary at the same time. Its all about the first step, then the assimilation.

Lots of jokes and funny stuff, pretty relaxed. Sir jy finally showed a bit more of himself, at least to what i think. Ah.

Ate dinner with them, and talked about random stuff. Before going home together on the mrt.

Guess its gonna be like this for pretty often, at least from now on.

Sometimes i wonder, is this right? And the two sides will instantly take their place. And i ask myself, is it worth it? I can't tell, i really can't. All i can try to do is compromise, and sometimes, that is what leads to the end of everything. So i am sorry, even though you probably don't know who you are, and you'll probably never see this post. I am sorry. But more of me thinks its worth it than not. You'll never know until you try right?

And another thing. Something's got me pretty pissed off on friday. Ah. Maybe its not as bad as i think it is. But it seems like it. And i hate it when people get credit for things other people did. Even if they did small little things. And its not our fault, when you don't even want to delegate roles and etc.

Ah. I kinda like myself better now. Its more natural i guess, to act like this, to behave like this. But i have no idea how long it'll last. Should i fail to keep this, God help me.

Of things that happened.

2007-10-18T21:39:00.000+08:00

Shall blog about yesterday's meeting and today. Haha.

No idea how much i can actually reveal, so most of it is weird. Haha.

Crazy. Went back with qy and cheryl after learning that there was supposedly no meeting. Met the class on the way back. Took the train. Alighted, reached home. Qy calls, and says that the meeting's still on. At bedok princess macs. Put down my bag and rushed there.

Yea, so the meeting. Haha, pretty informal and stuff. Only the three of us, and some seniors. Cos adelyn couldn't make it. They told us of all the jnco stuff, and groups to choose from.

Qy instantly took group 4. Then me and cheryl were deciding, but since we both did sec1 camp before, and blah, the seniors told us to try something new, so we both took another group. Ended up with a super enthu group, with meetings from yesterday till end of the month, except on sundays.

Finished the meeting after a while, qy went home, cheryl and i went to eat dinner, before going home.

Today! Went on a crazy recce after school. Walked around the whole buona vista area, i never knew existed. Haha, the group's pretty fun. Yea, and visited this super ulu place, that looked super out of place. Vacant houses with sealed up windows, etc. Scary. Looked like those kidnapper's place. Haha. Walked around quite a bit. Ended up with muscle ache at home. Too long without exercise. Gotta train up, or else we'll die ourselves in the camp.

And tomorrow's the run! Whoa. Funky. And the YWC cip. Ah. It feels so much like a year ago, again.

Happy day.

2007-10-17T21:00:00.000+08:00

Yea. Today was a great day.

Nothing big might have happened, but its always the small things that count, right?

And when you add alot of small things together, you get this wonderful day. :D

8+3 random things

2007-10-16T23:22:00.000+08:00

Blog keeping Rules:
1) Each blogger must post these rules first.
2) Each blogger starts with 8 random facts/habits about themselves.
3) Bloggers that are tagged need to write on their own blog about their 8 things and post these rules. At the end of your blog, you need to choose 8 people to get tagged and list their names.
4) Don't forget to leave a comment telling them they're tagged and to read your blog.

1) I have terrible personality changes from time to time. Swingy. :D Sometimes, i even wonder if i have split personalities.

2) I want to save the earth, in whatever way i can.

3) Direct copy! I love most types of music. Alt rock mostly.

4) Direct opposite! I have a super-powered short term memory, in which i can memorise all the info i need for a test in a short while, but forget them after, say a day?

5) Lets do something related to birthday too. For my sec school birthdays, i received a gay book, a piggy bank, and a photo frame.

6) I still hate taking photos with people. So usually, my camera's filled with scenery shots.

7) I have really random urges to take really random photos, like those on a highway.

8) I sleep with two pillows.

9) I like breaking rules, something i only recently attained.

10) I treasure memories and mementos much more than anything else. So... I keep lots of stuff, and keep even more stuff.

11) I don't tag people.

Grah.

2007-10-16T19:55:00.000+08:00

The usual one day late post about yesterday. It was the usual, arcade, then off to daryl's house. Played so much lame games! Some press the buttons thing, some racing games, and the usual shooter ones. Same old company that you never get tired of. For some reason.

Made a few weird, yet interesting plans too.

Shall try to achieve them by the end of this year.

One. Cycle down the east-west line. From one end to the other, Boon Lay to Pasir Ris!

Two. Stay in macs for 24 hours straight, if it opens for 24 hours, why not?

Or, alternatively, survive through one night at macs.

For the time being, more to come! Since we're a bunch of crazy guys.

It occurs to me how ironic the situation is now. I'm the screwed up one now, while kevin has the life i used to lead. Doesn't matter though, just a few more days and it'll be over.

And might as well blog about today. CCA and subject combi talk. Not much details here. Bio Physics is banned. And of course Bio must be paired with Chem, why? Because they only miss a T to become a bitch. Haha, cos bio's labeled as BI, and chem as CH.

Gonna aim for 4H2, bio, chem, geog, maths. And hope my chem bucks up. And i guessed i pretty much planned my uni route as well, NUS life sciences course! with a major in Pure Bio. Since i don't really like biomed, or genetics, and rather deal with ecology. Probably end up as an Ecologist/Environmentalist/Conservationalist hybrid when i grow up, HOPEFULLY.

Signed up for ISAC, because it would look good on the portfolio, and it seems pretty interesting anyway. MSC's bio side is way too into biomed and genetics, so i just skipped past it.

Went for squad lunch. Ate, talked a bit, went home. Nothing really much happened i guess.

Oh and there was a squad meeting this morning for the squad chalet, quite funny, haha. Kept digressing, and somehow everyone seemed to have found the traffic surveyor job, cheryl got it from grace! Haha.

Bleh. Nothing much else left.

I'm seriously...

2007-10-14T18:11:00.000+08:00

BORED AND IN NEED OF SOMETHING TO DO.

Its only 6! And i already have nothing better to do. Games don't seem interesting anymore, Animes seem to get boring after a while, there's nothing left to read, blog-hopping can only last so long, and there's nothing else to do!

Come on, give me something to do.

Even though i'll regret what i say, when the meetings and jobs and whatever come.

Good times, Good times.

2007-10-14T14:17:00.000+08:00

Yea. Yesterday was freaking fun!

Went out with the daryl, kevin and geoffery. Went to eat lunch at PS, and walk around with kevin and daryl first, then went to find geoffery. Finished his taxi job then, he went to eat.

Lan a bit, then decided to go eat dinner. The nice place near the lan shop was gone tho. Then, went to the foodcourt at PS to eat. Ate finish, walked around, tried to find some movies to watch. But didn't manage to since we were still mostly underage, haha. Just a few more days to all our bdays.

Then, we decided to go get cards to play, since we didn't want to go home yet. Went to this 7-11, they only had the 5.60 cards, then the shopkeeper guy told us to go to the mrt 7-11 to find the ah-la-oo-din cards. Haha, not to insult him or anything, but it sounds funny.

Went there, they had it at 3.60 or something. Then we went to cold storage, bought the "bin wang" cheapo cards, for 1.90. They smell weird tho.

Walked around trying to find a place. Some of the suggestions were crazy, haha. Play outside the Istana! Nah, in the end, we went to the Istana Park. Some cool secluded corner. Played bridge and tai tee. Then later, geoff had this idea to go into the water area. Took photos with self-timer, quite cool. After that, we just stoned a bit, before going home.

Really freaking fun. Haha. Pics are over at geoff's blog.

Fun, and a good company, makes me go crazy. Haha, never actually had this much fun, or went this crazy in a long, long time. Must try this again.

Another note, can't wait for monday, and 22nd. More fun times.

Eh.

2007-10-12T22:33:00.000+08:00

I've been reading certain things.

And i guess, i'm just jealous.

Well, its too early for a endofyear post but.

2007-10-11T19:11:00.001+08:00

I'm sorry. But i can't wait for this year to end.

Its been a crazy year. Of regrets, and what-not.

I can't take it anymore. And I'm not going to try.

3 weeks more. And then it'll be okay.

EXAMS.

2007-10-10T23:14:00.000+08:00

Anti-exams Rant.

Yea, teachers always say. As long as you do your best, its okay.

But no. Obviously its not okay. Or else, why threaten the students with the possibility of being retained? Getting kicked out? Retaking the papers? Why?

Because Singapore cares about the single piece of paper with your scores on it. And Singapore cares ALOT.

One single sheet of paper, with a few letters on it, can determine your future. Your entire life.

Have anything less than As, and you're kicked out. Only the fittest survive, don't they? The best, creme de la creme. However you spell it.

To be continued...

Exams.

2007-10-10T23:03:00.000+08:00

Ah exams results. The other levels just finished their exams, and here comes our results.

I'm seriously screwed. I didn't actually believe it when i saw my marks for chem at least. I really didn't and can't. First time in my life i studied so hard, (okay, maybe second, since psle was pretty study hard too) and what? I get rewarded with an AWESOME score of 55/100. Lowest in class i guess. My section A almost accounted for half the marks. 25/30. Still lower than the average of 26.5. Then section B and C. 16/40, 15/30. Awesome. Good job!

And then when you hear complains of how people got so low for their section b and c, and they actually get like what? 25/40? Then you feel so pissed off, and depressed. Pissed off at yourself for being so damn weak. I don't understand this at all. Depressed because you scored so low.

And to think it was the EASIEST paper. Congratulations, you suck.

Then the other papers. La. Hopefully film will get it up.
10/25 for the section A of Hamlet.
14/25 for expository.
15/25 for comprehension.
18.5/25 for summary.

Sucks. 57.5/100. Half of it added to LA film. Please pull my marks up. A B for overall would do.

Geog probably saved me from committing suicide on the spot.

50/75. Thankfully. Hopefully, it'll bump me an A for overall.

Maths, was quite crap. 56/80. For both papers. And thanks to my lousy ca1/2 scores. I won't be getting any As out of this.

Next up. Bio and Physics. I pray. I can't afford to lose my only things above B. I really can't.

Service for Nature.

2007-10-10T22:55:00.000+08:00

Yea, here comes the service for nature post.

Whee, love the elective overall. Loved visiting those places, loved seeing those things. Love the beautiful scenery. Might sign up to be a Semakau guide, if holidays permit. 6 Trainings, whoa, before you become one. Pretty cool! Haha, imagine. It could be a backup job if i ever get retrenched next time.

But wow, seriously, to think that these places still exist in singapore. I guess, its time the public knows about all these, learn about all these, understand the need for all these. The next time the government tries to build over one of the places without a really good reason too, then its time to send in the letters.

Whee. Speaking of which, there's still a few places left to visit, before they get destroyed, eventually.

Labrador beach, and the last remaining rocky shore community!
Chek Jawa!
Kusu island's nature part.
St John's island's coast.
And might as well, Sungei Buloh, Semakau, and any other places we could go again!

Nature sure is beautiful. And peaceful. Seriously, it seems such a good break from the hectic and fast-paced life here in Singapore. Sometimes, i guess, i should go there, and relax. Break away from the problems of modern society. And destress. Or just forget whatever problems we had.

Priorities change. As developement goes up. Time to preserve whatever's left, before we are really left with nothing.

Service for Nature.

2007-10-09T21:59:00.000+08:00

Whee. Shall blog finish about the elective.

Monday,went to school for a presentation on one of the areas designated. I think ours didn't stand out as much as the others. Oh well, theirs were like 4 times our in slides and content alone. Whoa.

Then, we went to pool, after being stranded in school for a long time because of the rain. Played quite a long while. Qy and Jerome vs me and yw, haha. We won 4 they won 2, so in the end they treated us to drinks. First two, they were winning, but they shot in the black ball to the wrong hole. Next two we won, then i shot in the black ball at my first shot. Then the last one they won. Saw jocelyn, zhiying and yujia at the busstop, quite cool, haha. Then went home.

Today was awesome. Went to school, then to sungei buloh. Walked through the mangrove part first, saw tree-climbing crabs, and mudskippers, and halfbeaks, and the occasional gutfish. High tide, so not much to see. Then, went to a quiet area for our presentation. Quite funny. Haha, all the proposals. Oh, and monitor lizards. Like many many of them.

Then went on a longer path, saw much more things. Like migratory birds, egrets, little brown jobs, haha. Then on one of the bridges some of the girls and sj actually saw an oriental whipsnake, ran away once they screamed tho. So didn't get to see it. Didn't get to spot any crocodiles too. Sadly. Haha.

Ms Wang almost stepped on a monitor lizard, haha, and she screamed, and jenny screamed. Haha. Damn funny.

Went to the aerie at some point, felt the wind, saw johore, and relaxed. Then went to harborfront. Quite cool. Tho this trip has ended. Might actually volunteer to be a Semakau guide, grace and camelia were saying how they wanted to too, on the mrt ride.

Talk about the overall elective tomorrow, or another day i guess.

After that, the vballers and sj went to vball. Me, tommy, jerome, jasvin, camelia, jenny and grace went to eat. Walked around food republic for damn long, before going to pastamania in the end. Took really long to order, and really long to get our food, for me jasvin and grace who ordered lasagna and baked rice. Haha. Grace went crazy with the cheese. Haha, she kept adding more and more. Pretty fun, went back home. Camelia and jasvin went to take the bus, then me grace and jerome went to take to outram and changed mrt. Talked a bit, played some lame logic game, the 1,2,3,4,5 if this is 2 what is this? game. Haha. Quite funny, thought of it as way too complicated before, got it in the mrt. Jerome didnt get it, so me and grace took turns trying to show him, not sure if he got it, cos i got off first. Hm.

Yea, all in all, a fun elective, an interesting guide, and of course, fun and interesting people. Haha.

Boo.

2007-10-08T23:42:00.000+08:00

Funny how life gives you things you don't want, and yet, doesn't give you the things you want.

2007-10-07T21:06:00.000+08:00

What wasn't meant to be will never be.

But that will not stop me from trying.

2007-10-07T18:33:00.001+08:00

And another post.

Like kevin said, the small things in life really matter a lot, maybe much more than other seemingly more important things.

I think, i'm learning to appreciate everything more. Maybe its something that comes with the closing of each year.

Just a few more months before the end of year4.

Good Times.

2007-10-07T15:36:00.000+08:00

The title clearly states what yesterday was. Good times. Haha.

Met early at northpoint, to play arcade! Haha, topped up like 30 bucks with 5 bucks bonus, but didn't play more than 15 according to kevin. Played so many lame games, haha, all the shooter games, and bishi bashi. Haha, then went to eat lunch at kfc. Stole daryl's ezlink, to get the students meal. Talked abit, then went off to daryl's house.

Haha, played some lame side scroller game at first. Then, on to halo 3. Completed the game at heroic. With 4 of us, kevin, daryl, me, and ew who came later, swapping controllers and playing. All the lame stuff that happened in the gaming, haha, whacking each other, trying for epic stunts, and other cool stuff.

Then, not long after, it was 8 and we had our dinner, with daryl's brother and friends. Pretty cool conversation, about (copied directly off kevin's blog) the true purpose of the moon, how to divert a meteorite (see previous), midget tsunamis, radiation protection gear, medieval knights, etc.

Then completed the last mission, haha. EPIC! Was trying to aim for a super epic hero-escape-while-explosions-go-around-him scene, but failed. Cos, one, we kept dying, two, we kept dying, and three, we kept dying. Tried running on foot, but didn't work either. In the end, there was this not-so-epic-escape by ho and ew, two cars racing to the end, but ew died, cos his area exploded. Could have used a few cheesy lines and stuff to make it more lame, like "go on without me, i'll only slow you down" and "how could i afford to leave you behind", hahaha.

Then, went home at like 9 plus. One full day of fun, with the old gang again. Next time, its their bday celebrations. Haha.

continued.

2007-10-05T11:33:00.000+08:00

It was Ubin on wed. Not as fun as Semakau. Went around the places, mostly to find out about sustainable development, and the lifestyle of the people there.

So first, it was walking around the funny path, leading to the sensory garden and such. Lots of things planted there, pretty cool too. There were scarecrows too, made out of cans and cloth and stuff. Sensory garden was basically a place of sight, smell and sounds. Pretty cool.

Then, we went to the coastal area. There were interesting things, Antlions, which were the larvae of the lacewings, i think. They build burrows, which slope down towards the center with a hole, and when an ant gets stuck, the vibration alerts the antlions, which flick sand at the ants, and cause them to fall in.

Pretty much the only interesting thing there, and the mud lobsters, which build big mud piles, which look like shit. Haha. And the huge termite mound. Which are more related to cockroaches than ants.

Walked around abit more, before going back to the first place we entered. Sat down, our guide treated us to free coconuts or drinks, so most of us got coconuts. Quite nice. Haha. Then, we discussed the questions and stuff, before going back.

Went back with the vballers and hannah. They got off at Kembangan, then me and hannah took the bus for longer. And alighted at the wrong stop. So i reached hq, before going back home all over again. And that is why i hate one-way streets.

Then thursday, went to RMBR for a lecture and discussion. Walked to the conference room, which meant we walked on a ledge, quite cool. Talked about coastal protection, before the lecture by the professor, Peter Ng. He's quite cool, and interesting. Liked the lecture, then after that we went home. After eating lunch at megabites cafe again, this time me and yw shared a pizza. Haha, quite nice and big for 10 bucks.

Then, went out with the old gang at evening to night. Met with geoff and ew at tampines kfc first, Damn fun. Haha, played cards until the person told us to stop. Then, waited for the others to come back.

Went to play lan, which was pretty fun, cs and castle fight. Until the others had no money left in their account. Then, we went to eat dinner at cs while geoff went home. Damn fun time at there, ate and talked. Then, we decided to go somewhere else to walk and talk. Then in the end after visiting a few places, we went back to tamp kfc. Super funny here. Made daryl talk about his three chapters of tjc life. Haha, super funny. And of old times, the past, and whatnot, went home at 9.

Good old days, eh? Sometimes i wish for them to come back. But still, maybe some of the things that happened wouldn't have happened if they didn't leave. Life's weird, huh?

haha.

2007-10-02T16:03:00.000+08:00

Somehow or rather, i have no idea how, i always seem to contradict myself on something by sometime.

Weird huh. But hey, life's pretty good. Service for nature's really fun. Been to a few places, did quite a few things we wouldn't get to do. And the best part, the course is like a few thousand bucks for 22 students, which means it at least costs 90 bucks per person, cos a few = more than 1, and yea, by division. For free, pretty cool stuff.

Alright, so we were the first to start the electives. Went to Pulau Semakau on sat. Surprisingly, it doesn't actually stink that much, and it doesn't look rubbishy as well, since they place soil over it, and let plants grow. Took a speedboat there, pretty cool! So first, we had this video screening, and a presentation by this lame old guy. Damn, he was bloody funny, making all sorts of lame jokes that made us laugh like shit. Then, we went on a short bus trial, visited the factories and all the boring stuff. Oh, and at one point where we stopped, there was super nice scenery. So snapped a few photos before we left.

Then the fun part. After a short walk through a mini forest, that was like our jnco's route march, we went to the intertidal area. The guide kept saying things like stonefishes, and stingrays might be inside, so we better step on bare sand. The tide was receding, and it was pretty much low tide, and we walked through quite a bit of distance. Cool thing was the pools of water left and the corals/sponges inside. Saw quite a few things i didn't think i would ever see in singapore, like starfishes, sea cucumbers, hermit crabs, other crabs, seaworms and slugs, oysters, clams, and all sorts of shellfish, hard/soft corals, sponges, anemones, and the highlight, octopus and the blue spotted ray. Really amazing.

Sun was setting too, so it made for really nice scenic shots, and then we had to go, before it was too dark. Walked back through the now-dark forest, and being nightblind partly, i couldn't see anything. Finished the journey, took the speedboat back in total darkness, which is pretty cool, seeing how singapore is bright and lighted up and orangey. Reached kallang mrt pretty late like 9, 10, then went to eat with the vball people, went home, and reached home at 11!

Then monday was back to school for a short discussion on the biodiversity, then an activity on creating a food web for the organisms we saw.

Tuesday, which was today, was a visit to the raffles biodiversity museum. Which we went before, but this time was much more cool. Went one round around the exhibits, and ate lunch, then we had this practical session. We walked around and played with the specimens, haha. Soft and squishy. And the horseshoe crab, which is like my favourite thing in there, the tail broke off, was trying to fit the tails to another smaller one, and stuff like that. Touched the stuff, like the sea bear, and other squishy things, like the squid and the hard things like the corals and starfishes. Then, we had this quiz on the phylum of the animals where we had to identify what phylum they belonged to. Quite fun, got 12/15 leh, not bad lor. Highest was 14/15 and they got a free shirt! Like wow. The prizes increase in value.

Then, we went for a tour around the insides. There was this cool compactor thing, where you press a button and the shelves move out or in. Quite freaky, especially with all the dead animals, and the chance that someone might close the thing. Then you get squished to death. Then the course person kept turning off the lights causing lots of people to scream. Haha. We visited the birds, the mammals, and the preserved in liquid side. She said there was even a foetus inside. Scary. Then, the insects and things like that side, where everything was hot and stuffy.

Being a taxonomist is pretty cool though, (a person that classifies the stuff), you get to name things after people or whatever if you wanted to, and it was a new species. Pretty cool, but tiring to count the number of scales or spikes just to find a new species. But it would be cool to name something after something else. At least you can brag about it. Haha.

Yea, thats pretty much all. This seems to be a pretty good option. Fun. Might actually become one someday.

Off to Ubin tomorrow~!

the end.

2007-09-28T20:58:00.000+08:00

I've learnt. If something isn't meant to be, then i guess, it will never be. No matter how hard one can try.

Yea. Thats right. I'm jealous. But of what?

On another note, i hope you are alright.

Benediction

2007-09-25T21:52:00.000+08:00

A Franciscan Benediction

May God bless you with discomfort

At easy answers, half-truths, and superficial relationships

So that you may live deep within your heart

May God bless you with anger

At injustice, oppression, and exploitation of people,

So that you may work for justice, freedom and peace.

May God bless you with tears

To shed for those who suffer pain, rejection, hunger and war,

So that you may reach out your hand to comfort them and

To turn their pain into joy.

And may God bless you with enough foolishness

To believe that you can make a difference in the world,

So that you can do what others claim cannot be done

To bring justice and kindness to all our children and the poor.

Quoted from Anberlin's lead singer's blog.
modesty.blogspot.com

Yea, thats pretty much what i think too. Without sadness, happiness just becomes routine, and it doesnt have that special happy feeling anymore. All things work in pairs, and they were made that way. A pair of opposites. Like in everything in this world.

If you're happy, its much easier for you to feel sad, and the sadness becomes much worse, than if you were sad already. So cheer up, because you will. Disclaimer, this you does not refer to anyone specifically, if you find that it makes sense to you, than treat it as you. I dont think i mind. :D

Anyway. Read it, it has quite a lot of cool stuff. Like his latest post on leadership as well.

Whoa.

2007-09-25T21:34:00.000+08:00

These few days have been weird and had its own ups and downs. Well, guess everything's like that.

BSP electives are crappy, i dont bother listening, neither do most of the people. Mainly because the stuff she teaches about have little or no impact on us at all, nothing to be learned and stuff like that.

Other than that, been reading a few books lately, and watching movies, ovas and in theatres. Pretty cool. I like bravestory. Haha. Interesting story. Yea.

Yesterday was the signing on talk. Pretty scary. Or freaky, or something. Just seemed so weird. Waiting period was funny. Just read books, along with cheryl, tiffany, zhiying, adie, all with their own books. Haha. Quite weird. Bunch of people sitting there reading books. But yea, ate lunch where i got accused of copying someone. Haha. Talked a bit about the BSP elective's xiao3 ming2 thing. Nov kids are pang4 somethin as in the fat pang4, which doesnt really make sense. But heck. Yea, wanted to play ball, but in the end just did nothing much.

Talk itself was freaky. Just i dunno. Weird. Ended at 3+, so couldn't go watch 881 with jiahui, yw, jm, js they all. Went tm anyway, was supposed to watch with kevin, but the next movie was way too late. So yea. Ended up meeting wanting and mabel there, went to times, walk around, then they went home. Stayed and waited for them to finish before going home together.

There were too many people at the mrt, so i just went to pr first, then went back all the way to aljunied. Kinda rewarding though. Saw josiah. Haha, talked a bit with him. Sawa beautiful sunset too, really, really nice.

Oh, and saw dickson and the std2 grace at tm also.

Hm, then today, after school, messed around with the cube until i got damn pissed off. Haha, i hate the cube now. Then, went to bedok library. Quite a lot of books that i wanted to read. Pretty cool.

Side note. I want to watch JOSHUA. But i am not old enough. AHHHH! NC16? That sucks, i am just a bit over a month away from 16 and i cant watch it yet. Sucks.

Anberlin's album Lost Songs is coming out on 20th! Haha. BUY IT FOR ME! Even though my birthday is like before that, and that is actually cheryl's bday. But hey. I dont mind belated bday presents, especially since my bday's in the hols. Haha.

Whee!

2007-09-22T23:36:00.000+08:00

Ah. These few days have been good i guess. Enjoyed myself pretty much. Guess this is what it is supposed to be like.

Think less of negative things and make them seem less negative.
Think more of positive things and make them seem more positive.
And stop thinking too much of certain things that dont actually mean anything.

Pretty good times, as said. Wednesday was bowling day. Then, went to pasir ris to pass kevin something. And a few other things that are better left unsaid. HAHA!

Thursday was bowling day too. Celebrated lwt's bday in the alley. After waiting like an hour for the bus to come. Met up with sj and went off for team outing, without hs cos he went to look for jobs. Ate at breeks, walked around and tried on clothes. Haha, pretty damn fun. Saw lots of dunman people there too.

Friday was yesterday. Career guidance which was rather boring. But still. Patch Adams! Super nice movie. Kinda touching. Too bad singaporeans will never have the kind of compassion. A way too fast pace of life, and lots of indifference. That, will come another time. Lots of careers. And after seeing those mice pictures, i guess i am giving up on life sciences, at least in that kind of field anyway. Experimenting on mice is really really REALLY against my morals. Guess its some kind of ecologist or something job for me. And that google whiz kid. WOW. I am freakily amazed. GOOGLE. WOW. At the age of 27.

Stoned around in the end in the canteen with wynne, mabel, jiahui and joshua. Would have played vball with the vballers but they were having training. Went out after a while, went to 711, ate tang yuan. Haha. Fun. Then, mid autumn. Quite okay i guess, apart from the sec123s messing with things. Like playing with fire, refusing to sit down, throwing pomelo skins, etc. In the end, went home with adie, pei jean and wynne.

Saturday. Today. Mr Chia's ROM! Haha. Super cool. Was burning up. But i guess Mr Chia was worse off. Haha. Quite cool. Went out with the class people after that. Toys r Us and dinner. Lotsa crap. Pretty fun i guess. And yea. Here i am.

On another note. I guess i am becoming happier. Partly because of the small things you did that actually matter a lot and seem really meaningful to me. So, thank you. That was the first time we had a random conversation, right? Haha. Even though it was short cos i went to sleep. Oh well. And other things of course. No matter how insignificant it might seem, it probably did impact me a lot. So thanks. To everyone, for everything. Even if i actually ignored it.

On yet another note. I think i am slowly being converted. Or has always been a subconscious Christian. Kinda weird. Maybe its the songs. Maybe its the people. Maybe its Maris Stella. So many possible reasons. Not too sure of it myself. But hey, i like christian things. So yea.

Whoa.

2007-09-18T23:06:00.001+08:00

Just talked to yw and jm on the way home on the mrt. Quite cool. Everyone has so many thigns they wanted to do. Which then prompted me to create a list of things to complete by the end of this year, which means by 31122007, 2359hours. Haha.

1) Learn to play the guitar.
2) Learn to play the piano.
3) Learn to play any other musical instrument that i can actually learn (aka drums)
4) Learn to rollerblade.
5) Learn to cook.
6) Learn to iron clothes. Its the only housework i can't do okay. Apart from cooking.
7) Learn some other skills.
8) Work. And earn money.
9) Read. A lot of books. Haha.
10) Cycle down the whole of ECP to Bedok Jetty
11) Run if i have the time.
12) Meet up with old friends.

More to come some time later.

Okay.

2007-09-17T21:55:00.000+08:00

Way overdue post on EOY. They ended quite a while back. Quite weird. On one hand, there's the feeling that i should be studying even though exams are over. Probably some crazy exam mugging syndrome. Haha. So it should pass over soon.

Then there's the way too free syndrome. Where i imagined sunday to be a day in the hols already. Crazy. Didn't feel like there was going to be school on the next day at all. Fun.

Started looking for jobs. Quite cool. I need to earn some money now and in the hols, to get stuff i want and other stuff. Haha.

And then, there's the finally indulging yourself in whatever you wanted to do but didn't have time to during the hols syndrome. Started chionging One Piece today. 270 episodes to go. With the weekly/fortnightly naruto and bleach and random but nice OVAs. Ah well. Then, there's the occasional good book from the library, Stamping Butterflies is really good. Either its Secret and the time-travelling OVA i watched or some crazy wish to travel in time instinct in me, i am seriously hooked on time-travelling books. And stuff like that. Wow. Pretty cool though, all those stuff i had read, watched and searched up.

Then there's arcade, and crazy massive computer games playing. Whoa. Fun stuff i haven't touched for so long.

And so much other things such as facebook. Which is why this post took a few hours to type finish. HAHAHA!

Of course, whats a day without a nice song.

2007-09-12T21:37:00.001+08:00

[ Elliot Yamin - Wait For You ]

I never felt nothing in the world like this before
Now I'm missing you
& I'm wishing that you would come back through my door
Why did you have to go? You could have let me know
So now I'm all alone,
Girl you could have stayed
but you wouldnt give me a chance
With you not around it's a little bit more then i can stand
And all my tears they keep running down my face
Why did you turn away?

So why does your pride make you run and hide?
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it's a lie what you keep inside
This is not how you wanted to be

So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you

It's been a long time since you called me
(How could you forget about me)
You got me feeling crazy (crazy)
How can you walk away,
Everything stays the same
I just can't do it baby
What will it take to make you come back
Girl I told you what it is & it just ain't like that
Why can't you look at me, your still in love with me
Don't leave me crying.

Baby why can't we just start over again
Get it back to the way it was
If you give me a chance I can love you right
But your telling me it wont be enough

So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you

So why does you pride make you run & hide
Are you that afriad of me?
But I know it's a lie what your keeping inside
Thats not how you wanted to be

Baby I will wait for you
Baby I will wait for you
If it's the last thing i do

Baby I will wait for you
Cause I don''t know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I'm fine it just aint true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do I'll wait for you

God. I can't believe how well this sums up EVERYTHING i feel towards you. Though you probably won't ever read this. Ah well.

Edit: Suprisingly, this turns out to be the TRUE 183 post. After clearing out double posts and useless drafts. Amazing how things turn out eh? I'll still be waiting though.

Whoa.

2007-09-12T21:27:00.000+08:00

Been a while since i updated. Holidays were boring. Studying sessions. And stuff like that. Studied the whole afternoon at pasir ris library yesterday. Halfway through, this super fire alarm rang, and lasted for quite a long while. And i was wondering what happened. Especially since it was Sept11. But after a while, it stopped, there wasn't any burning smells, no flashy explosions, no police teams rushing in, no screaming people, flailing arms about, so i guess nothing much happened.

Ah well. Wonder what would have happened if there indeed was something. Scary.

Been having very very weird dreams, about random people. It gets scary. Probably impossible scenarios that my brain cooked up. Truly scary. Especially those of the friendships that died. AH. Enough of that i guess. Oh yea, seems like i shouldn't overload myself with too much information before i sleep, aka, play a game. As it starts my brain off to create so much thoughts, that i never get to sleep. Wasted at least 3-4 hours tossing and turning, no idea when i actually slept.

Lastly, its geog tomorrow and i am pretty sure i am screwed, cos i have no idea what most of the stuff is about. And then, its chem. And finally, its all over.

Lastly lastly, one rant. WTHeck! They didn't bother testing NUTRITION(P/A), TRANSPORT(P/A), RESPIRATION, EXCRETION, HOMEOSTASIS, NERVOUS SYSTEM, DRUGS, MICROORGANISMS much at all! WTHeck! Remembering all those enzymes in the stomach, intestine, pancrease, remembering the stuff in systoles and diastoles, remembering the stuff in inspiration and expiriation. And what do they give? Two questions on reproduction. One on ecology. One on clotting and stuff.

Eh.

2007-09-05T20:51:00.000+08:00

Have been studying my ass off in the hols, every single day, I'll have to go out to study, cos home is way too distracting, with stupid brothers, and a even more distracting laptop. So yea, been going to random places to study, pr library is not bad tho, quite a fun place haha, with nice books when you get bored.

Been playing and meeting up with the gang again, haha. Went to play lan and eat dinner and talk crap with them a few days back, pretty fun. Whoa, we changed quite a bit too. Haha. Cool stuff.

Hmm. Studying's pretty okay now. Not too bad, pretty fun sometimes.

Well, its a crazy life! Waking at 7, doing random stuff till afternoon, then go out to study, reach home for dinner, then play like crazy, till 1 or 2 am, then talk crap, then sleep. And the cycle repeats! Haha...

2007-09-02T23:06:00.000+08:00

Number 183.

I would have typed something special on this post. But heck. I can't really be bothered. Haha. Been listening to Anberlin. Lyrics makes me think, which is kinda good. Interesting at the very least.

Meaningful eh?

Quote, It is amazing, how we look back on the times we cried and laugh at them, and yet, when we look back on the times we laughed, we cry.

Yea, some random random stuff.

Haha. Funny how Anberlin's labeled as a Christian Rock band, and how i am listening to it, even though i am a freethinker. Christianity does make some sense when you think about it. Some of it, at least. But hey, being a freethinker's fun. And much easier.

Whoa. This turned out longer than i thought. Would spam meaningful lyrics now, but am too damn lazy to do anything. So yea. Bye.

Anberlin!

2007-09-01T20:46:00.001+08:00

Just bought cities! Haha.

Anberlin - Godspeed

Find the video on youtube cos the posting of the video's creating some problems.

Burning down neverland (scatter the ashes)
White lines black tar the matches
Is this another death by misadventure
Tell me what you got, what you really got (hey hey!)
We’ll rest in our graves,
Lexington course your veins
Sleepers can't just wake the dead
When needles and lovers collapse on guilty beds

Fall asleep, don't fall asleep
Don't fall asleep

(They lied when they said that the good die young)
They lied when they said that the good die young
woah-oh-ah-oh
They lied when they said that the good die young
stay with me, stay with me tonight

Burning down bridges now (scatter the ashes)
Godspeed to all you're after
Is this a life left just to remember
Tell them who you were, who you really were (hey hey!)
Kill yourself slowly over time, fashion statement suicide
She's still asleep in a Chelsea hotel
Bad turns to worse, and the worst turns into hell

Fall asleep, don't fall asleep
Don't fall asleep

(God save the eyes that dim tonight)
They lied when they said that the good die young
woah-oh-ah-oh
They lied when they said that the good die young
Stay with me, stay with me tonight

woah-oh-ah-oh

They lied when they said that the good die young
woah-oh-ah-oh
They lied when they said that the good die young
Stay with me, stay with me tonight
They lied when they said that the good die young
woah-oh-ahoh
They lied when they said that the good die young
Stay with me, stay with me tonight

Cool stuff.

2007-08-29T20:26:00.000+08:00

http://modesty.blogspot.com/

Anberlin's lead singer's blog. Pretty cool. Philosophical!